Have you ever clicked on a porn video and felt you need to read a review of the video before actually watching it?
You probably haven't. But if there was someone who could offer you those services in order to make sure you never have a disappointing wank, you'd appreciate it.
That's why 'JizzIMDB' is the hero that nobody needs, but everybody wants.
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It's better that we leave any questions about how I came across this guy unanswered, that's a story for another day.
Although I stumbled across him by accident, I found his reviews not only helpful, but fairly comical. If these are done in a sarcastic manner, they're funny. If they're done from a serious standpoint, they're fucking hilarious.
A finishing time and a jizz rating is genius.
He wasn't so impressed with a Lisa Ann video, which could be considered controversial. However porn music can be very annoying and sometimes a video without a storyline can be wishy washy.
Addressing camera angles is very much something that'll go a long way for avid porn watchers. Also, letting people know that there's an annoying voice throughout the video is key. You can adjust your volume settings accordingly.
The fact that he will sit through a terrible video until the end to review it is sublime dedication. He could very easily have turned this off and chosen something else to review. But he's not about that. He's here to do his duty to all of us. What a hero.
This is, err, a bit weird. But I suppose the more depth he goes into the better the review.
It wouldn't really be complete without a 'Fake Taxi' review, really. Although a lot of them can be quite samey, it's good to know what you're getting into. This one sounds a bit more adventurous than your average 'episode'. They actually venture outside of the car and get busy on the bonnet of the car (I'm going assume he means bonnet, I don't think taxis have balconies).
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All in all it sounds like one of the better videos 'Fake Taxi' has made and on the basis of this review, I'd watch it.
As the old saying goes: 'Not all heroes wear capes.'
Words by Mark McGowan
Featured Image Credit:Topics: PornHub