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Woman Reveals How Being A Sex Addict Affected Her Life

Woman Reveals How Being A Sex Addict Affected Her Life

The married mother has now written a book, Getting Off, where she talks about her journey through addiction

Rebecca Shepherd

Rebecca Shepherd

Unlike alcohol or drug addiction, there is still no formal diagnosis for sex addiction.

And to make matters worse, female sex and love addiction is similarly not recognised as a genuine addiction disorder. And one in three sex addicts are female with women being less likely to seek help.

One woman who knows about this issue all too well is 35-year-old Erica Garza who was once addicted to porn and seeking out potentially dangerous sexual encounters.

This all started aged 12 when she began masturbating regularly and was watching soft porn. The Los Angeles-native says her sexual habits were healthy until she was diagnosed with scoliosis in grade seven, which resulted in her being bullied for wearing a support.

Erica, who is now happily married, told FEMAIL: "I started using masturbation and porn as an outlet for emotional distress and low self-esteem when I was twelve, the same year that I was diagnosed with scoliosis and started getting bullied at school for wearing a corrective back brace.

"When I was trying to achieve orgasm, all of my worries and stress just melted away and I came to rely on sexual release as a crutch for dealing with difficult emotions."

But soon she says things got out of control, and according to Flare, her interest in porn and masturbation grew and she started having cyber sex with strangers.

At 23, Erica moved to Maui in Hawaii, to work as a waitress and was sleeping with different people more frequently than she had before.

By her late twenties, she was having difficulties remaining faithful to partners, and her obsession with sex found her in dangerous situations, both at home and when travelling abroad.

Although she felt shame around her behaviour, Erica says she couldn't stop.

The married mother has now written a book, Getting Off, where she talks about her journey through sex and porn addiction. You can buy it here.

She told FEMAIL: "I started to seek out the same feeling of shame and pleasure I got in the type of porn I watched in the sexual relationships I sought. If a man treated me poorly, this was okay, because the shame I felt in allowing myself to be mistreated mirrored the shame I felt in watching degrading porn.

"I watched hardcore porn in which women were degraded. I needed harder clips in order to feel something because I'd grown desensitised to softer porn.

"I also sought out sexual relationships in which men said or did degrading things to me just like I'd seen in the clips. I came to rely on porn and sexual experiences that produced shame in me because shame was an integral part of my pleasure.

Instagram/ericadgarza

"Even if I was having a lot of sex, there was always a wall up between me and the other person. I was scared of being vulnerable and didn't trust intimacy.

"But coming clean about my addiction has allowed me to be more honest and open about who I am, and this has allowed me to connect more with others. I am now happily married to the first person I ever confessed my addiction to."

Flare reported that in her book, Getting Off, Erica details many of the destructive ways she used sex. In one chapter, she reveals how she made her boyfriend hire her a 19-year-old sex worker while they were together in Thailand after they had yet another drunken fight.

In another, she recalls the time she blacked out and stripped naked in a bathtub in front of a group of men.

Erica attended her first Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous meeting when she was 30. Explore more here for local meetings in your area.

Featured Image Credit: Instagram/ericadgarza

Topics: Entertainment, Sex, Community, Los Angeles, Addiction, Health, US