Have you ever heard the one about the Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman walking into a pub? Course you 'ave, because if you've ever been into a pub in this country, you'll know there's always at least one person who tells the same jokes over and over and over and thinks they're the funniest thing on the planet.
Well, collectively, that's exactly what Britain is up to at the moment. The joke? Storm Eileen (read on before you complain) is coming to Britain. Eileen. Coming. Coming to. Oh, come on!!
Yes! You finally got it. Come on Eileen.
Although it was released in 1982, Dexys Midnight Runners hit Come on Eileen has been a staple of weddings, birthday parties and school discos ever since. Its feel-good chorus is the stuff of singalong dreams. The image of Kevin Antony Rowland dressed as a rag and bone man getting jolly in the streets of Kennington while his band play accordions, violins and a bit of string on a stick creates a lovely sense of folkish, barnstorming fun. Come on Eileen? Maybe I will.
And with news that the UK is about to be hit by a 75mph storm (bantz), the internet has gone into overdrive. Everyone and his dog is making the same joke over and over in Gif and Twitter form.
So what the funk? Basically, a lot of people have been posting images and stills from the 1982 Number One hit single and tittering to themselves in the belief that they're the first person to do so.
Unfortunately, for many people in Scotland, the top bantz of the internet is likely to be no laughing matter, with warnings of severe flooding set to follow 1.2-1.5 inches of rain in the south-west of the country and warnings that shit (technically known as debris) could be flying around left, right and centre.
Annoyingly for spelling pedants, the storm is actually called Storm Aileen. So, technically, all references to the Dexys Midnight Runners classic - voted 18 on VH1's 100 Greatest Songs of the '80s - are technically null and void. But we can't let that get in the way of a good viral bandwagon now, can we? For anyone interested in further reading on rain-related music, here's a rundown of the best artists/songs to be found in the sodden genre:
- Stormzy - Actual name Michael Ebenazer Kwadjo Omari Owuo, Jr; the grime star chose his moniker after a school trip to Cowdenbeath, where it rained cats and dogs for two days solid, forcing him to stay indoors and pen his first mad vicious grime lyrics. Almost all of the words above are categorically false.
- Purple Rain - Perhaps Prince's most famous song, Purple Rain is a critique of what the artist formerly known as Squiggle saw as rampant corporate pollution, with acid rain turning purple due to carbon emissions from factories in his native Minnesota. The previous sentences are categorically untrue.
- Singin' in the Rain - the 'rain' in the video for this song is actually milk, because translucent water couldn't be made out on black and white film at the time. That is categorically true.
- Wet Wet Wet - The Scottish band were originally just called Wet Wet, but were forced to change their name because a Jazz Funk band from Burkina Faso already had it. That sentence is categorically untrue.
- Fool in the Rain - One of Led Zeppelin's most funnest (and best) songs. That sentence is categorically untrue.
Come on Aileen!!!
Words: Ronan O'Shea
Featured Image Credit: PA Images