There's a pro and con to everything. For example you can drink and have fun, but tomorrow you'll have a hangover. You can cook a brilliant meal for yourself, but you'll have to do the dishes. You can get hyped for a Star Wars marathon, but will know eventually Jar Jar Binks will be on your screen. You can be a passionate Everton supporter who truly believes it's 'The People's Club', but they're managerless and devoid of any major talent in their squad.

The only thing to come without any cons is having a friend who has a dog. You get to see the dog a lot, play with it, take loads of pictures of it, but you don't have to clean up its shit.

Instagram user mattsurelee is a man who is very aware of this sort of data and has even made a popular account off the back of it. He often posts graphs, pie charts, and pros and cons lists of everyday scenarios - much like a recent one about first date locations.

He hits the nail on the head, really. There is no perfect place for a first date.

For example, if you take someone to the gym for a date, you're a knob, and Matt has clearly outlined that.

He starts with a bar, which you'd think would be ideal, but of course you realise it's not when you factor in the drink(s) required for for Dutch courage, then 'just one more' for Double Dutch courage, then another when you meet your date, and then continue to drink to keep up this charade that you're a fun person. Eventually you're in the toilet chundering.

This sort of thing is the real research we should be doing, rather than determining if vaping is actually bad for a douchebag's your health.

Matt also likes to pose us with tough scenarios where you can only pick two of three things:

I mean, let's consider having to choose whether:

  • You find your Tinder date attractive and can hold a conversation with them, but it's clear that they will will murder you
  • You're attracted to them and they're not very murdery, but their conversational skills are on a par with Janice from Friends
  • You can hold a conversation with them and murder is off the agenda, but you're not attracted to them in the slightest

A grim set of options. So what have we learned from this? Simple: don't ever go on dates and don't ever go on Tinder.

Featured Image Credit: PA/Instagram

Mark McGowan

Mark is a journalist at LADbible, who joined in 2015 after a year as a freelance writer. In the past he blogged for independent football fan channel Redmen TV, after graduating from Staffordshire University with degrees in journalism and English literature. He has worked on campaigns such as UOKM8? and IIOC.

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