Remember the 2,000-year-old sarcophagus that I warned you all was absolutely cursed? Well, despite my warnings, archeologist have cracked it open to check out what is inside - other than a curse, obviously.
Prior to prising open the casket, there was a lot of speculation over what might be inside, the remains of a high-profile figure from ancient Egypt, piles of gold and jewels, the final resting place of Alexander the Great, a curse that wipes out humanity? No one knew, all they did know was that it had lain untouched since it was buried there over two thousand years ago.
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However, once opened the team were greeted with three skeletons, who experts reckon were probably military men, based on their wounds. The bones were resting in a red liquid, that archeologists are calling 'sewage'. Delightful.
Anyway, loads of people now want to drink the red liquid in the hopes that it might give them specials powers. The special power of literally shitting yourself to death, I imagine.
As it's 2018, there's even been an e-petition set up, with the imaginative title: 'let people drink the red liquid from the dark sarcophagus'.
It's got almost 6,000 signatures already and reads: "We need to drink the red liquid from the cursed dark sarcophagus in the form of some sort of carbonated energy drink so we can assume its powers and finally die".
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Sounds fair enough to me.
Archeologists spotted a crack on the right side of the massive tomb, which has allowed sewage to seep in and caused the bodies to decompose. And who wouldn't want to knock back a lovely glass of that, eh?
The remains will now be taken to the Museum of Alexandria where a team of experts will give them a proper look over, and maybe find that one of them is Alexander the Great, I mean, they did find a big alabaster head near by. The casket will also be taken to the museum, where it will be fixed up and eventually displayed.
