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I'm sure you don't need me to tell you the world is absolutely fucked at the minute. I mean, seriously, what the fucking fuckery is going on?
2016 has been one of the most disastrous and depressing years on record. Countless terrorist attacks and suicide bombings, racist abuse and attacks in Britain increased following Brexit, there were violent clashes between fans at the Euros and, most recently, the Turkish military attempted to overthrow the government.
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To add to the chaos, David Cameron resigned as Prime Minister, Boris Johnson was appointed our new Foreign Secretary, Nigel Farage stepped down as leader of the Ukip party, and Chris Evans sensationally quit Top Gear.
Granted, not all of the above announcements have been bad news but, still, can everybody just calm the fuck down for a minute? My head's chocker.
I've also developed a whole load of trust and attachment issues. That's mostly down to the considerable amount of legendary celebrities who've passed away. People whose incredible talents helped make the world a little brighter. It's just been death, death and more death.
Since January, we've lost Alan Rickman, Prince, Muhammad Ali, Caroline Aherne and Harambe (GBNF) to name but a few. I'm a shadow of my former self from all the tears I've cried. Nothing makes sense anymore. Well, it didn't until I stumbled across this little theory doing the rounds on Twitter...
You and I both know it makes perfect sense. The universe just hasn't been the same since we lost Bowie.
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Come back and sprinkle some of your magic on us again soon, Starman.
Words by Sian Broderick
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