What has happened to all the people who design what Pokemon look like? Have they all been sacked and replaced with children because it's cheaper labour?
Over the past decade or so a new batch of monsters have arrived and they have looked less and less like anything that closely resembles an animal and more like a bunch of squiggles and shapes.
Think I'm wrong? Look at this absolute casualty. Meet Charjabug.
What type of Pokemon is this? I have no idea. Maybe it's like Metapod and it evolves into something semi-decent. As for what attacks and powers it has, I've hazarded a guess and this is what I've got:
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Underwhelm: Your enemy expected more and as a result you have caught them off guard. This ability drains their focus by 30%.
Mow The Lawn: As you already look like a lawn mower, why not go the whole hog and make a decent $20 on weekends by cutting back old Dorothy's 10ft x 10ft lawn. You know she struggles now she's in her later years.
Charge: Run your enemy over with the two cones on the front of your vehicle? Will do enough damage to maybe make a five-year-old run home to mummy.
Oh and by the way it gets even better. According to IGN there are, in total, SEVEN new totally dog shit Pokemon that have been revealed after an embargo was broken by an apparent Russian source.
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If you want a full look at the new batch of monsters you can see them all over on IGN. A warning though: one of them is apparently called Cutiefly. For real.
Words by Matthew Cooper
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