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Nelly Has Explained Why Kelly Rowland Sent Him A Spreadsheet Text Message

Nelly Has Explained Why Kelly Rowland Sent Him A Spreadsheet Text Message

Welcome to Nellyville.

Patrick Hulbert

Patrick Hulbert

Nelly's hit 'Dilemma', featuring Kelly Rowland, is a piece of R&B royalty, but why on this dear planet does Kelly Rowland try and use a spreadsheet to text her man in the video?

She puts: 'Where you at? Holla when you get this" into Excel and it never made sense.

This has, of course, been immortalised in the form of a meme.


She was mad that Nelly didn't text back to it. Well you wouldn't, would you, it was a bloody Excel spreadsheet. That said, there's a lot of conflicting noise coming out as to whether she was texting Nelly lad or her other fella, but I'm plumping for the former. Perhaps that can be the next thing Nelly can clean up for us? The most important thing is she gets annoyed because the man doesn't reply to one message. High maintenance. Dodged a bullet.

Here's the clip so you can quench your desire to know what all of this is about...

Credit: Vevo

Now Nelly has spoken out like a confession to a Catholic priest.

He told Channel 10: "That was the thing at the time. That was the new technology at the time. It looks a little dated now, I can see that."

Here he is talking about it...

Credit: Channel 10

The track was released in 2002 and, as I had a Nokia 8310 in 2002, I can categorically state that this was NOT the technology of the time, so why you lyin' Nelly?

Apparently you can actually do this, but why would you when you're Kelly Rowland? You have enough money to buy a mobile phone. A decent one. A reliable Nokia. If at 14 I could have a Nokia 8310, the world is your oyster.

Why would you even want to use a spreadsheet? They're the bane of many people's lives (mine included). They are purely used to make people who are no good at their job look organised and on top of things. They do nothing. Excel should be banned from all existence. Yeah, Bill Gates, you swine.

He probably didn't know what the hell it was coming to his phone. He almost definitely panicked, and you ditched him over not replying. Cold. Cold and heartless.

Of course, even though she did dump the poor guy, he was the only one for her, and she couldn't stop thinking about him and his smooth R&B tones in the video.

Nelly is currently touring Australia and New Zealand. 'Ride Wit Me' to Australia to see it, then 'Shake Ya Tailfeather' and do something else that he sang.

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