Professional idiot Karl Pilkington has revealed he once almost died all because of a boner.
Now, I know what you're thinking. Karl's been a traveling man over the past few years. This boner was probably green and/or the result of an infection. Something massive that he downplays.
In truth, it's actually a much more archetypal Karl Pilkington story.
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It happened when a fire broke out when he and girlfriend Suzanne were holidaying in Tenerife.
The couple had been having some fun in the sheets when the building began to blaze, and Karl, when asked to evacuate the building, wasn't quite ready.
"I do not like being nude," he told the Daily Star. "We did not have a much money and we stayed at this apartment in Tenerife that wasn't very nice.
"It was when I was younger, I had a bit more energy. We started having it away a bit."
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"Suzanne told me I better get it. I said, 'I can't get it now, I'll have to wait a bit.'"
"The banging is getting louder. I open the door, it's a fireman. I just stick my head round and he's going, 'You'll have to get out. The building is on fire'.
"So I'm like, 'In a minute'.
"I had to wait a minute. I couldn't get my pants on."
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Image Credit: An Idiot Abroad