Like most summers since I was 15 years old, I'll be spending most of my time sat in beer gardens drinking the nectar of the gods and lamenting the fact I can't find a job that wants to pay me to do what I love doing.
Growing up, my summer jobs included paperboy, waiter at an old people's home and full-time zombie killer on Call of Duty. Those were some wild days but not once was I paid to drink alcohol. I did the paying for my food and beer.
Now, possibly the greatest summer internship ever offered to anyone is up for grabs and it involves copious amounts of free beer.
World of Beer, a Florida-based chain of craft beer taverns, is looking for three interns who will spend four months travelling the world, tasting all sorts of beers, attending beer festivals and posting about it on social media.
Sound like a dream job? I haven't even mentioned the best part yet. It's all expenses paid and you get $12,000 for the 'trouble'.
We're recruiting three Drink it Interns to hit the road this summer and search out the best craft beer and food the world has to offer. We'll send you down the street and around the world to capture the best beer stories and document them by blogging, capturing video, taking photos, Facebooking, Tweeting, sharing Vines, Periscoping, and anything else you think would be awesome to help tell the tale.
I think I want to cry. Why wasn't this available when I was unemployed and desperate to drink myself into oblivion?
Then I read the small print and it turns out you need to be over 21, which I am, and a US citizen, which I am not. Time to get my green card by any means necessary. It may only be a four-month internship with no prospect of a full time job or any benefits, but fuck it. It'd be a dream come true.
Now, where's my P45? Sorry boss, I know you'll be reading this.