Donald Trump is officially president! America has gone from the first African-American leader to an angry man-child with a history of law suits and sexual assault. But while the world looks over at the USA in complete dismay, let's talk about Trump's fourth favourite thing on the planet (behind himself, himself and, well, himself...) MONEY.
During his time in the White House (soon to be renamed Donny's Fun House of Locker Room Talk), Trump will earn $400,000 (£322,120) annually, in addition to a $50,000 (£40,265) personal expense budget, a $100,000 (£80,530) non-taxable travel account, and $19,000 (£15,285.50) just for 'entertainment'.
Now, for someone like Trump who has a net worth of $3.7 billion (£2.98 billion) and thanks to being given a 'small loan of one million dollars' (which apparently counts as having a 'tough time' in life), $400,000 is penny change. But for everyone else in the world, $400,000 is HUGE!
Just think what kind of things you could buy with that kind of dosh...
Your very own private island
For a mere $400,000, you could live peacefully while America deports everyone who ever said mean things about Donald Trump's hair.
Credit: PA Images
1.6 million Freddos
This one is probably a decent shout. Not only were they the symbol of my childhood (I was a fat child) but at the rate they're going they'll likely go for a tidy £10 each in a couple of years.
1538 pairs of Yeezy boost 750s
I used to like Kanye, but since joining the Kardashian clan and apparently losing his mind (according to Twitter), he seems more concerned about pumping out over-priced and pretty ugly pieces of clothing than making good music. But people apparently still shell out a £250 a pop for these moon boot-looking trainers, which is cool, I guess.
6 bottles of Acqua di Cristallo Tributo a Modigliani (really expensive bottled water)
We all know that one person that insists drinking tap water will mean your children are born with 12 toes. They only buy their bottled water from Waitrose because its 'pure and full of nutrients and blah blah blah'... I usually zone out at this point. But it's time to show them up with these $60,000 (£48,246) 750ml bottles of water. Sourced from either France or Fiji, it presumably gives you super strength or makes you 10 years younger. It probably doesn't, but it does come in a fancy golden bottle so there is that.
Let's be honest, though, Trump is unlikely to do any of these things. He'll probably have to chuck it straight in to paying off all that debt his various companies owe. These currently stand at $650 million (£522.6 million), so as long as he's never voted out of office he'll be debt free by 3641. Better save those pennies, Donny.
Words by Mike Thomas
Featured image credit: PA Images