It looks like the one week of summer we get annually is set to be ruined by a load of angry wasps.
Yeah I know, that kind of sounds like every year - but bear with me.
These particular wasps, known as 'yellowjackets', are distinguishable by the three 'black dots' on their evil little faces. They're also larger than your standard wasp, at around half an inch. They originate from Germany, and can sting repeatedly for pretty much no reason. Bastards.
According to the Sun, experts are saying that the mild winter coupled with a warm spring has resulted in ideal breeding conditions for the Devil's housepet.
Ian Urquhart, of Advanced Pest Management, told the paper: "Many insects will have come out of hibernation early to seek food.
"It means we could have more prolific breeding trends and a larger population.
"We will only know for sure later in the year but we could be facing a bumper season."
Members of the public have also been warned not to 'smoke them out' or anger them, because they could swarm. And no one wants that. Another expert added: "The advice is to stay calm.
"If you agitate the wasps they send messages they are under attack and you end up dealing with a swarm."
For those of you up North, good news. They're known to populate the South of England and the East Midlands in Leicestershire and Rutland. However, full disclosure: they can populate anywhere.
The paper noted that last summer, members of the public were reporting that German wasps were stinging people for no bloody reason. Why won't they just leave us and our fruity ciders alone?! We only get a short summer, let us enjoy it.
Anyway, apparently once the wasps have provided their queen with enough nectar, they get to enjoy life. They fly about, invading your picnics and beer gardens and think they're Billy Big Bollocks. Experts warn that they can feast on fermenting fruit, which makes them 'tipsy and extra bold'.
Alright, fair enough - they've got their work done and they're having a drink and a laugh. That's understandable.
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