Group Of More Than 500,000 Hatch Plan To Storm Area 51 Armed With Pebbles

If you're going to storm a highly classified United States Air Force facility, you're going to need to have a totally solid plan. So without further adieu, allow me to introduce you to a group of people who plan to storm Area 51 by throwing pebbles.

On the surface, this may seem like a foolish plan, but - as the group's name 'Storm Area 51, They Can't Stop All of Us' suggests - Storm Area 51, They Can't Stop All of Us is founded on the belief that the US Air Force won't be able to stop all of them.

A group of more than 400,000 people are planning to storm Area 51 armed with pebbles. Credit: Stock Connection/Shutterstock
A group of more than 400,000 people are planning to storm Area 51 armed with pebbles. Credit: Stock Connection/Shutterstock

Admittedly, the US Air Force have heavier artillery than mere pebbles, however, 237,000 people have said they will be attending the storming on the group's Facebook page, with a further 265,000 clicking interested. As such, if these interested people do decide to turn up on the day, the US Air Force will need at least 502,000 bullets to stop them all... So presumably the group is banking on them not having that many.

But there's more to this storming plan than just pebble-throwing. In a pinned post on the event page, the group's apparent leader laid out the master strategy.

He said: "Ok guys, I feel like we need to formulate a game plan, I've put together this easy to follow diagram here for a proposed plan.

"The basic idea is that the Kyles form the front line, if we feed them enough psilocybin and monster energy and say that anyone in camouflage is their step dad, and the entire base is made of drywall then they will go berserk and become an impenetrable wall.

"Then the Rock Throwers will throw pebbles at the inevitable resistance (we don't want to hurt them, we just want to annoy them enough to not shoot the Kyles as often).

"While this is all happening, the two Naruto Runner battalions will run full speed around the north and south flank, and shadow clone jutsu, effectively tripling our numbers, and overwhelm the base (red circle)."

Jackson Barnes has devised the group's master strategy. Credit: Facebook
Jackson Barnes has devised the group's master strategy. Credit: Facebook

At this point, if you're wondering why more than 500,000 people have shown interest in this storming, it's basically because conspiracy theorists have often speculated that aliens and UFOs are being hidden in there (as Jackson puts it in his rallying cry, 'Let's see them aliens').

If you're wondering what a 'Kyle' or a 'Naruto Runner' is, I'm afraid I can't help you.

The storming has been scheduled for 20 September this year, and if your main wondering is whether or not 400,000+ people are going to be slaughtered, fear not, Jackson added the following disclaimer to his master strategy.

He said: "P.S. Hello US government, this is a joke, and I do not actually intend to go ahead with this plan. I just thought it would be funny and get me some thumbsy uppies on the internet. I'm not responsible if people decide to actually storm Area 51."

So, if you're already one of the 500,000 strong army, make sure you remember to not turn up armed with pebbles on 20 September.

Featured Image Credit: Facebook

Jake Massey

Jake Massey is a journalist at LADbible. He graduated from Newcastle University, where he learnt a bit about media and a lot about living without heating. After spending a few years in Australia and New Zealand, Jake secured a role at an obscure radio station in Norwich, inadvertently becoming a real-life Alan Partridge in the process. From there, Jake became a reporter at the Eastern Daily Press. Jake enjoys playing football, listening to music and writing about himself in the third person.

Next Up

arrow-down arrow-left arrow-right arrow-up camera clock close comment cursor email facebook-messenger facebook Instagram link new-window phone play share snapchat submit twitter vine whatsapp logoInline safari-pinned-tab Created by potrace 1.11, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2013