You Can Now Buy Edible Chocolate Bum Holes

Christmas is great and all, but it ain't half a pain in the arse to get all that present buying sorted before the big day.

It's just exhausting having to traipse around town in the pouring rain, seeking out gifts that somehow strike the balance between looking great but costing next to nothing because you're actually a tight bastard.

That means all your relatives are given a veritable selection of socks, mugs and calendars (and that's if they're lucky) - none of which anyone wants or needs, so they'll just sit on the dining room table for a few weeks before being rammed in to the back of a cupboard.

And then there's the bloody secret Santa at work, where you've frustratingly been given Julian from accounts, who is possibly the most BORING person in the world.

Well, why not treat ol' Julian to something a little more, er, unique?


That's right, don't get Julian a novelty tie or a jar of Marmite with his name on it - what he really wants is a box of chocolate anuses!

The milk chocolate edible anuses are being sold by PrezzyBox for just £6.99, meaning it'll fit right into that £5-8 secret Santa budget. Maybe pad it out with a Toblerone if you're feeling particularly generous.

The chocolate anuses cost just £6.99. Credit: PrezzyBox
The chocolate anuses cost just £6.99. Credit: PrezzyBox

"Greet a friend or loved one with this extreme tongue in cheek gift for any occasion!" the product description reads.

"See the surprise on their face when they open their gift to realise they have a box of edible anus chocolates!

"Yes, you heard us right, anus shaped chocolates! They are made from real milk chocolate and packaged in a very elegant box, which makes them even more unsuspecting!

"This box of naughtiness is great to give as a gift to cheer up a friend as well as to make your partner laugh as you devour the box of 'anuses' together! It really is a gift given from the 'bottom' of your heart!"

Maybe not one to give your mum... Credit: PrezzyBox
Maybe not one to give your mum... Credit: PrezzyBox

You know what? I'm not sure this is something that should be shared with the world, not just Julian from accounts. You should probably get a few boxes to share around with the LADs at work, and I'm sure your boss* would love a pack as well.

Well, welcome to 2018 everyone. Don't worry, it's almost over.

*Do NOT buy these for your boss.

Featured Image Credit: PrezzyBox

Jess Hardiman

Jess Hardiman is a journalist who graduated from Manchester University with a BA in Film Studies, English Language and Literature, and has previously worked for Time Out and The Skinny among others.

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