MP Warns That 'No Deal' Brexit Could Mean 'No Holidays'
Imagine it - the year is 2019. The UK has crashed out of the European Union with no deal, no plan, and no engraved carriage clock by way of a 'thank you for your service'.
Instead of travelling to Magaluf to eat fish and chips and get drunk, the British public are forced to travel to places like Bournemouth and Weston-super-Mare to - well - eat fish and chips and get drunk.
Only now, instead of doing it on a lovely sunny beach where sea is warm, and the cerveza is cheap, we'll be hunkering down in the charred husk of a Wetherspoon pub in a town where the rain falls horizontally and the ground shakes with the constant earth tremors brought about by the Government's accelerated fracking plan.
This truly would be a bleak future - but it is a future that is being predicated by some MPs who are obviously not confident in the UK's crack team of negotiators bringing home a decent deal from Brussels.
Of course, I'm just joking - except the parts about fracking, that is actually causing earthquakes - but in all seriousness, Labour's Daniel Zeichner raised the issue of holiday travel and business in Parliament today during Digital, Cultural, Media and Sport questions today.
He spoke about a business that is within his constituency in Cambridge and said that a 'no deal' Brexit would mean brokering 72,000 individual deals with EU-based firms.
That's when he dropped the bomb. He said: "I have a major internet-based hotel and travel booking company in my constituency and, in the absence of an adequacy deal, they will have to strike 72,000 separate contractual agreements with hotels across Europe.
"Does the minister understand if Brexit means Brexit, no deal means no holidays?"
Whoa, whoa, whoa. They never said that they were going to come for my yearly jollies.
If Ayia Napa 2019 gets cancelled, we riot LADs.
Obviously, this isn't guaranteed. It might never happen. This is a double-edged sword though, because while it might not happen, it also reveals that - frankly - nobody knows what is going to happen.
One thing is for sure, we'll have a new commemorative 50p, so that's good - maybe?
The Government's DCMS secretary, Jeremy Wright, moved to quell the fear, saying: "I think that's ever so slightly on the alarmist side.
"What I would say to him is it's important for us all to bear in mind that the starting point here is that we can comply with all the data adequacy measures that the EU requires.
"We have implemented the GDPR and we are therefore in a very good position as we begin these discussions; we can, therefore, be optimistic about their outcome."
At least we can rest assured that all of Britain's historic holiday towns such as Blackpool, Skegness, Bridlington and Llandudno will be filled with what we can be sure will be well-behaved, patriotic British tourists throughout the coming summers.
What could possibly go wrong?
Featured Image Credit: PA