As a forewarning, this article contains footage of a man who has smeared his own crap on his face. If you - like many people - don't fancy that, choose a different article.
It's only just past midday, but this is guaranteed to be the strangest and most disgusting thing you'll see today. Fancy watching a video of a man who has smeared his own shit on his face? Of course you do.
The man in question is called - well, he goes by the name of - Atlas Talisman. He's a 37-year-old self-styled 'poo wizard'. He is a motivational coach who believes that men's anuses have become shameful and stigmatised through homophobic and germophobic attitudes.
Confused? You should be.
Anyway, he tried to explain why he smeared shit on his own face in a video on YouTube. He basically gave himself a poo facial in a bizarre attempt to show that poo - and the place that it comes from - is nothing to be ashamed of.
Full disclosure, it doesn't make a single lick of sense. Here goes, anyway.
He said: "I wanted to hold solidarity with my sisters by actually getting shitfaced with full pride. You know? respect the rectum. I think it's one of these unifying things, when we can actually reconnect with our own bodies and not feel shamed about our poo.
"You know? Being poo positive, or as I like to say poo-sitive then we can actually finally start getting over the separation from our own earth, our own mud, and therefore the earth of mother nature. So, for all of those who want to have solidarity, protect the rectum and be poo-sitive, I encourage you to get shitfaced with me and maybe celebrate creatively."
Yep, what we should all be doing to encourage 'solidarity' and 'poo-sitive' attitudes is smear our own shit on our faces. Let's crack on then, gang.
Oh, in case you're a bit curious - or a bit unnerved - about what he means by 'celebrate creatively' then let's just clear that up right now.
Towards the end of the video, Atlas produced several pictures that he had drawn using - you've guessed it - his own shite.
He's basically finger painting with poo. It's an interesting artistic statement, but it's unlikely to turn up in the Tate Modern.
At least, not when it should be in the Loo-vre. Sure, that's bad, but it's not as bad as 'poo-sitive', is it?
Describing his 'art', Talisman said: "I've also created what I can 'faecal fractals'. It's amazing the microcosm and macrocosm that we can find."
He then signed off by saying: "Stay human, love your bums, we all have them."
Well, he's got one thing right.
Featured Image Credit: Instagram