Well, folks, we've had a good run on this planet, but it looks like our time may be up - humanity may be about to become obsolete.
And what's the cause of our imminent extinction? ROBOTS, of course. But while you may have always assumed Skynet was on the verge of self-awareness, prompting the rise of the machines and the enslavement of humanity, that has nothing to do with our current predicament.
Nope. The real answer is that we have reached the era of highly realistic sex dolls - indeed, the Daily Star claims some can 'go all night' with women who 'can't tell the difference' - presumably ending the need for procreational sex and bringing about the death of the species. Oh well, at least it's not something weird.
Sex dolls manufacturers Realdoll have released a range of silicone robots that have settings to perform conversations with their owners/partners - the dolls are described as 'extremely lifelike', albeit presumably by someone who has never seen a real human being.
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They have freckles, birthmarks and scars, though, which I guess is lifelike.
I mean, humans do have freckles, birthmarks and scars - though they also have the ability to move independently of someone quite literally turning them on, which one suspects is more difficult to replicate in a robotic sex doll.
Of course, sex robots aren't a new concept and - surprise, surprise - women are far from the sole target audience.
The newspaper interviewed a bloke who was more than a little pleased with his purchase of a female sex doll, which set him back the thick end of 12 grand.
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"I was watching her eyes brink and head move around, facial expressions, which added a great deal of realism to it," said the 60-year-old man, who gave his name as 'Brick Dollbanger'.
Answers on a postcard, please, as to what Brick Dollbanger does for a job. Imagine having that on a lanyard.
He added: "I noticed she was getting very extreme expressions, like she knew what I was doing. It kind of shocked me."
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This is all getting a bit 'Pris from Blade Runner', isn't it?
Brick continued: "For me, I usually have pornography going, I like watching porn.
"I wouldn't say I'm a porn addict, but when I'm with the dolls I like to have porn going. I liked that when I had real girls too. It adds to it.
"When you're watching porn, if the woman is very verbal... the sounds coming from the screen kind of transfer to the doll. It's much more realistic."
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Oh well. Here's to the end of humanity, then.
Featured Image Credit: SintheticsTopics: Science, Sex and Relationships, Interesting, Weird