Charles Bronson, who now goes by the name Charles Salvador, has shared his dream meal-plan - and fucking hell, the man can eat.
The 'Salvador Diet', which was shared on Facebook by his fiancé Paula Williamson, has a calorie count that would make a competitive eater wince, with 12-egg omelettes for breakfast, sausage and mash followed by 12 cheesecakes for lunch and 12 bacon rolls for dinner. Oh, and six portions of beans on toast as a snack. A fucking snack.
The infamous prisoner, who has been banged up almost continually since 1974, is well-known for violence and sieges on the inside, but since meeting Paula is applying to have his life-sentence, for taking a prison art teacher hostage, reduced.
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Sharing the list, Paula wrote: "Want a body like the Big Man? You too could be as fit as him. Simply follow 'The Salvador Diet'.
According to the Mirror, the hungry prisoner's dream menu would look like this:
Monday: Six fried eggs on toast with four crumpets for breakfast. A lunch of whole roast chicken with roast spuds and spinach, with an apple pie and cream after. Dinner would be a Spanish omelette with chips and beans, followed up with a cream cake. He would also like to snack on fish and chips and fairy cakes.
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Tuesday: Breakfast would be a 12-egg omelette and two pints of squash, with lunch of braised sausages, mash and swedes followed by 12 cheesecakes. Dinner is liver and onions with mash, and three trifles with ice cream. Snacks? He'll have 20 bags of nuts and 14 pears.
Wednesday: This is 'liquid day', so Salvador won't be having any solids. Instead he'll be working his way through two pints of squash, tea, coffee, four pints of milk, six pints of water, three pints of Guinness and 10 Pot Noodles.
Wait, what? Pot Noodles aren't liquid, I'm not having that. Obviously, I'd never say that to his face. I mean, if Salvador wants to tell me Pot Noodles are liquid, despite the fact they clearly contain noodles - which are solids - then who am I to disagree?
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Thursday: Six bacon rolls, nine sausages and four crumpets for breakfast, please. Lunch is a T-bone steak, with chips, beans, three eggs, mushrooms and four rolls, followed by a dinner of 12 bacon rolls with a pot of tea. He'd also like four cheese and two ham rolls with French mustard to snack on, of course.
Friday: Four chicken legs, eight pieces of toast and nine poached eggs for breakfast. A school-dinner-style lunch of shepherd's pie and carrots followed by jam-roly-poly and custard, with a beef curry, 10 cans of beer and an entire tub of ice cream for dinner. He'd also like six portions of beans on toast and some dates.
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Saturday: Saturday starts with three bowls of porridge, three grapefruit and eight boiled eggs. Rump steak with mash and peas, followed by four pears for lunch, and for dinner he'd like lamb hot pot, followed by six Manchester tarts. More fish and chips for snacks, as well as three sausages and a tub of ice cream.
Sunday: Not a day of rest for Salvador's belly. He'll have 10 yoghurts and three watermelons for kick-off, then a whole turkey, roast potatoes, carrots and cauliflower for lunch. Dinner? He'll have a whole goose with peas and mash. He'll keep himself topped up with rump steak and chips for a 'snack'.
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He definitely wrote this when he was hungry. There's no way he could eat all of that, surely?
Featured Image Credit: Barcroft ImagesTopics: Diet, CHarles Bronson, Prison