Five-Year-Old Leaves People In Hysterics With Poem About 'Smelly' Dad

Kids really are masters of being brutally honest, often saying it - or in this case writing it - how it is...

In this case, one dad was slated for, well, pretty much every physical feature possible by his five-year-old ray of sunshine.

Tara Sedgwick/Alamy Stock Photo

Possibly the nicest thing she did is dedicate the poem to her old man... either that or the grand finale sentence: "I love my dad, he's a lovely lad." But that was just to show off her rhyming couplets a bit more.

But more about brutalities of the poem, because we know that's what you're really here for.

Well, in a nutshell she called her pops lazy and smelly before insinuating that he's fat and needs a shave. Charming.

In the full poem, she wrote: "My dad is called Frazer; he never uses a razor.

"He has a beard, and he is really weird.

"My dad is really small, and his head is like a ball.

"His ears are big, and I think he needs a wig."

Facebook

Not quite finished ripping in to her dad, she added: "My dad is crazy, and in the mornings he is lazy.

"He has a big belly and is very smelly."

Potentially realising she's gone in a little too hard, she signed off: "I love my dad, he's a lovely lad."

Brilliant.

The poem was shared to the Facebook group FAMILY LOWDOWN TIPS & IDEAS by the little girl's mum who said it was 'too good not to share' and we couldn't agree more.

Commenting on the post, one person wrote: "That's insanely good for a five year old, wow. So funny too."

Another added: "Five year old using an apostrophe, and correctly?! All words, including tricky, spelt correctly (and not phonetically)! Clearly, a genius!"

Someone even tried to draw what they thought the dad looks like:

Facebook

A fourth said that they were 'picturing Frazer with his beard, belly and head like a ball'.

Others were too keen on calling out the little girl's spelling as one Facebook detective wrote: "Not enough spelling mistakes for a five year old... suspicious."

Anyway, the original poster cleared up any criminal motive by explaining: "Of course she had help with spelling.... She's 5! Lol."

Topics: UK Community, Community, UK

Rebecca Shepherd

I'm Becky - a journalist at LADbible. I graduated with a First Class BA in Journalism before going on to cover criminal court cases, medical tribunals and breaking news for the national media - which inevitably and eventually became as glum as it sounds. Can often be found rocking a bag for life - which I made a 'thing' way before Rihanna. You can contact me at [email protected]

@RJShepherd94