Everything We Learned From The First Episode Of Game Of Thrones
Well, bloody hell. That was one hell of a ride, wasn't it? That's only the first part, too!
As ever, there were revelations, cunning plans hatched, the occasional bit of incest, and that absolutely terrifying moment. Before we crack on, if you've not seen the latest episode, obviously you want to stop reading this right now.
SERIOUSLY, THERE ARE GOING TO BE SPOILERS AHEAD
As an episode, it feels somewhat like everything is building up. That's not an unusual thing in the world of Westeros, after all, that's what makes it so exciting.
This time, however, the characters are gathering for the final showdown. The last ever. The biggest battle of them all.
Many of them are at Winterfell. Jon Snow and Daenerys Targaryen have brought an army of the living to the Stark family home. Gendry, Tyrion, Varys and - who could forget? - Dany's two remaining dragons are all there as well.
For the first time in ages, all of the surviving Starks are in the same place, too.
Meanwhile, down in King's Landing, Cersei is doing what she does best: plotting people's murder.
As usual, she wants her brother Tyrion dead. She's even willing to send Joffrey's crossbow north with Bronn to make that happen. Oh, and she might have even put out a hit on her brother/lover/father of her children Jaime, too.
Euron Greyjoy - a mad bastard at the best of times - has decided to take Jaime's place in Cersei's bed. Good luck to him.
He's lost his niece and nephew, though. He's been off and enlisted the famous Golden Company sell swords, too. They are pretty handy in a scrap.
Yara and Theon have gone. Theon is heading to Winterfell and - you'd have to imagine - a frosty reception on more than one front. Yara is off to claim the Salt Throne, or stop Euron, either one would be good.
In an act of excellent fan appeasement, Jon Snow flies a dragon. Yes, it finally happened. That's all.
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There's a touching reunion between Samwell Tarly and Jon. That's about as good as it gets for them, though. Sam now knows that Dany and her dragons incinerated what remained of his family.
Sure, he didn't get on with them that well, but - you know - didn't want them burned alive. We all know some people like that.
Oh, and he has some news for Jon, too. Well, Bran Stark has some news for him, but given that he is now given over to sitting around staring and making cryptic statements, Sam has to tell him.
The news? Well, Jon is the rightful heir to the Iron Throne and the son of Rhaegar Targaryen. Oh, and he's been getting frisky with his own auntie, Dany.
But you already knew that. It was foretold.
Exactly how he's going to take the news that he's the true king is anybody's guess. Smart money would be on him brooding about it before doing the right thing, even if he doesn't want to.
That's sort of his schtick.
After that revelation, a moment occurred that might just be the scariest bit of the whole show. Given the death, horror, and reanimated corpses we've seen before, that takes some doing.
Whilst on a night-time wander around the abandoned castle at Last Hearth (why not?) a gang including Beric Dondarrion, Thormund, Edd - the Lord Commander of the Night's Watch - and a few others, discover a chilling symbol left behind by the army of the dead
In the centre is a murdered child - the young Lord Umber and the only other person left at the castle.
Oh, then it comes back to life. If you didn't jump out of your skin at that moment, you've got icier veins than the Night King himself. The army of the dead are through the wall and marching on Winterfell. Get in their way and you're in trouble.
Jaime Lannister - travelling at some rate - has made it to Winterfell.
All the pieces are manoeuvring into position. The stage is set. Five episodes to go, we're getting closer. One down, five to go.
Game of Thrones will air on Sky Atlantic at 2am each Monday morning, and again at 9pm on Monday nights.
Featured Image Credit: HBO