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Mark Zuckerberg Finally Answers Whether He's Actually A Shape-Shifting Reptilian Lizard

Mark Zuckerberg Finally Answers Whether He's Actually A Shape-Shifting Reptilian Lizard

They're everywhere. Blood-drinking, flesh-eating, shape-shifting, good-for-nothing reptilian lizards are hell-bent on enslaving the human race and there is literally nothing we can do about it.

From your local newsagent to your elected politicians to your favourite actor, actress or singer, they're all in on it. If you know someone who holds a position of power or influence over other people, they're probably a reptilian.

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The worst part is, it's impossible to know who is and who isn't a lizard. Personally, my money is on Taylor Swift, Kanye West and Boris Johnson all being actual lizards while the likes of David Cameron, Barack Obama and Nick Jonas are all just being controlled by the lizard overlords.

It's a scary time to be a regular human.

Arguably one of the most powerful men on the planet, Mark Zuckerberg, is far too nice a guy to have a squeaky clean record. Which leads me to believe that behind the boyish smile and the curly locks are actually a forked tongue and slimy scales and a mind hell-bent on world domination.

Unfortunately, I'm probably never likely to get the chance to ask the Facebook founder and CEO face-to-face whether he is actually a shape-shifting reptilian. I'd likely meet my doom if I did ask anyway, which is probably why this guy decided to ask through, of course, Facebook.

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Zuckerberg was hosting a Q&A using Facebook's new live video streaming program when someone asked whether the 32-year-old is actually a reptilian disguised as a human. He answered:

"Mark, are the allegations true that you're secretly a lizard? I'm gonna have to go with 'No' on that. I am not a lizard."

Sounds like something a lizard would say, to me...

According to IOL, the Facebook founder then paused and licked his lips.

I'm not saying Mark Zuckerberg is a shape-shifting lizard but all evidence points to the fact Mark Zuckerberg is a shape-shifting lizard.

Just sayin'...

Words by George Pavlou

Topics: Facebook

George Pavlou

Something witty and self-deprecating...

 

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