It's a scary thought there are around 165 million old £5 notes currently in circulation, all of which will be rendered useless after midnight.
Yes, it's a sad farewell to the cotton version of the fivers after the introduction of the brand-new plastic ones four months ago.
From tomorrow, the old paper notes will cease to be legal tender, which begs the question: what the hell am I gonna do with all the ones I have lying around?
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Well, the obvious answer is to visit a bank, building society or Post Office. But have ever considered doing the following?
Playing Monopoly
Go straight to jail... for using illegal tender! Image: PA
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Short of the cash needed to indulge an hour or so of board-game classic Monopoly? Why not use the old five pound notes?
They're of similar size, similar feel, and best of all, are utterly worthless outside any family living room.
Rolling a cig
Image: PA
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Short of rizla? Fed up of rizla? Simply itching to use your last old fiver in a stylish, symbolic way? Why not try rolling some tobacco into it.
Sure, the experience might give you tonsillitis - as my friend once discovered when she smoked an Arriva bus ticket - or worse, but if the craving calls and you find yourself in the middle of a forest with only an old fiver, 30g of Golden Virginia and some extra-slim filters to hand, what else are you gonna do?
Betting on something unrealistic knowing that you're only going to lose a worthless fiver
You're on! Image: PA
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'Hey, Ben.'
'Yeah, mate.'
'Five pound says that traffic warden across the street collapses form heat stroke in ten seconds.'
'Go on then.'
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'Ok. 1... 2... 3... 4... 5... 6... 7...'
'You're a fucking mug, you, mate.'
'8... 9... 10. There it is. You win, Ben! Enjoy the money.'
'Haha, eat THAT! Just gonna pop this little badboy into my wallet and save it fo- oh, nah, hang about. This fiver's old!'
'Gotcha!'
'Woah! Unbelievable! What are the odds? What are the odds?'
Put an end to wonky tables
You know the ones. Fold yourself up at least three old five pound notes, slide them in between the short leg of your difficult table and the floor and it's goodbye to one the first world's worst problems.
Convince somebody in the future that your old fiver is a special edition new fiver and sell it for at least £80
Image: PA
Don't act like this isn't a pretty decent idea.
Use it as fake ID
'Wow, wow, wow. You got ID, mate?' Image: PA
Forgotten your provisional on a night out? Underage but fancy going on a night out? Why not laminate your old fiver to make it look like some form of new identification.
Even better, cover the thing in grease or oil so that when the bouncer takes a hold of it, it slips out of his hand and onto the floor, temporarily distracting him for long enough that you can run into the club and buy yourself a cold one scot-free.
Using it off a glass table
Wipe away those crumbs!
Use it in some social experiment
You know those grating videos of vloggers handing out pizza or coffee to the homeless only for them to hand it back out of gratitude?
Film yourself giving someone on the streets an old fiver and you'll almost definitely get it back, what with them being absolutely worthless and all. But who cares? It'll make for a great sentimental video.
Featured Image Credit: PA