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When going on a lads' holiday, it's important that to know that everyone is as invested in the trip as you are.
Inevitably, there will be someone who has a girlfriend back home. While this isn't really a problem, it does mean that occasionally they'll be ruining parts of the jolly up by checking in with them, being tentative about certain activities and now and again being a bit of a liability.
There's not an easy remedy for this, really, if your mate is loved up, then you just have to put up with it and count your lucky stars that he's been able to flee the nest for a week or so.
After their mate surprisingly booked a holiday with them without telling his other half, these lads were fully aware that he'd be in the dog house. This meant that it was inevitable that his missus would do everything in her power to stop him boarding that flight.
"Whilst on a lads holiday at the start of February, he booked another lads' holiday for April without telling her, landing him firmly parked in the dog house, which he is wholly unequipped to climb out of," Josh Conroy, friend of the 'very wet' man, told TheLADbible. "In an attempt to get him out, as we're good mates with his girlfriend also, we drafted a school trip-style permission slip to make a joke of it with and things snowballed from there ending up with a formal holiday contract for both those attending and their significant guardians."
Not entirely sure about the final clause, though I think that's a story for another day. A day very, very far in the future.
In fairness to the group of lads, what started out as a joke, covered all of the necessary points, if we're honest.
Let's take Clause 5, under The Girlfriend section, for example. "There shall be allotted slots for girlfriend-to-boyfriend contact at times most convenient to the group as a whole without consideration of the individual circumstances." - Here, they nicely make sure that should either the girlfriend or boyfriend wish to phone or message one another, that it doesn't interrupt any of the planned activities.
The 'soft lad' - their words, not mine. Credit: Supplied
Cleverly, it continues: "Any breaches of this clause will result in a whack in the testicles for the male half of the offending party which, dependent on severity, may impact the marital life of both male and female parties of the relationship." - To begin with, it does seem that the missus can get away with breaking this rule, but there is one consequence they may bring from it in the long-term: infertility.
Genius. Immediate pain and suffering for one half, long-term family damages for the other. Tough to find a loophole.
For the second half of the agreement, under The Boyfriend section, all clauses point back to the first - becoming an immediate outcast.
"Failure to present the contract for execution in a timely manner may result in immediate termination from all social groups including, but not limited to, the Whatsapp group titled "Benidongs" formerly known as "Krakow Muppets"." Is it worth it, being kicked out of the group chat for life? No, it's not.
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