Let's talk about balls. Whether you have a pair metaphorically or not is beside the point. Big ones, small ones, hairy ones, ugly ones. You get it; we all have them, or at least know someone who owns a pair. They're important for obvious reasons and checking for signs of abnormalities should, if it's not already, be part of your daily routine.
I recently spoke to a lad whose life two years ago changed dramatically when he found out he had testicular cancer.
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As you can see, Rob and his mate Leon are just normal lads who never thought they would both have to face testicular cancer. Image credit: Facebook/ Robert Toal
Dad-of-three Rob Toal was 34 years old when he found a lump on his testicles. He was celebrating his 10th anniversary with the missus at the time in York. Not for one second did he believe, there and then, that he was at risk of having cancer. "At the time, I think the statistics showed one in four men getting it," Rob explained. "My mate, Leon, had it about 15 years before. As silly as it sounds now, I genuinely thought that I was in the clear because of that."
Today, testicular cancer is the most common form of the disease in young men. Cancer Research has published that almost half (47 percent) of cases in the UK each year are diagnosed in males aged under 35.
Before finding his first symptoms that suggested something wasn't quite right downstairs, Rob had grown his moustache for Movember and raised his share for charity in the process. But today, growing facial hair for charity has had a different meaning for him entirely. "It's been a platform and an opportunity for me to share my story and to talk to people who may not be aware of the importance of checking their balls," Rob said. "It's been great to heighten awareness around the often stigmatised topic."
Understandably, when Ellen, Rob's wife, found out about the lump, she was worried. She was adamant that he got the situation checked out by the doctors as soon as possible. Rob, on the other hand, who at the time was focusing hard on getting ahead in his career, didn't believe it was necessary and didn't want to make a fuss. He had hoped that the problem would simply fade away.
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Rob and his wife Ellen. Image credit: Facebook/ Robert Toal
After many excuses as to why he couldn't go to the doctors, Ellen had enough of the BS and booked the appointment on his behalf. He received a phone call saying that an appointment to see his local GP had opened up at 1pm. Rob gave in and accepted the medical opinion.
Two years later, his 'today' is very much owed to his wife's impulsive decision to intervene. Grateful doesn't even come close.
I asked Rob how he would have reacted if the shoe was on the other foot and his wife found a lump. He said: "It's weird. I didn't think of that at the time at all. But I guess I did ignore my own health. I have always been very much on top of making sure that Ellen kept up to date with smear tests and making sure she was healthy. I think I was more aware of her well-being than my own."
After the initial appointment, the lad was referred to Nottingham City Hospital after the GP decided that the lump didn't look good. Confronted with the honest medical opinion, Rob still remained hopeful that the lump was from either an injury at work or a hernia he had somehow sustained.
The second nurse also wasn't happy and passed him on to see a senior consultant. "He asked me to pull up my trousers and I was expecting him to say that everything was fine," Rob explained. "But no. Instead, the doctor told me that he will be removing my testicle shortly."
I'm not quite sure how the average man would react to being told that they are about to lose a bollock. Personally, I would think of my dead dog sitting on a cloud looking down at me with that smug grin on his face, reminding me that karma's a bitch. Maybe, considering the seriousness of why this procedure is taking place, I would accept the fate of losing a natural part of my manhood. But after speaking to Rob, I don't think we really consider it a possibility until it's happening. Maybe one monosyllabic word will put everything into perspective.
"Shit," Rob said when explaining his reaction. "Although I still didn't think it was testicular cancer. There were a lot of examinations going on around me and all I kept hearing was my name being thrown around the room while all these tests were taking place."
On September 27, 2014, Rob's testicle was removed. He may not have known it then, but the tumour the surgeons removed was indeed cancerous and worse, it had started to migrate. Left any longer, the procedure to 'remove' may not have been an option.
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Image credit: Facebook/ Robert Toal
"I remember hearing from Leon when he was going through a similar thing. At first, I kept advising him to get it checked out and he didn't; I didn't understand why," Rob explained. "He left it a bit longer and a bit longer. Eventually, it got worse and he finally got medical advice. Although it wasn't too late, he didn't make it easy for himself." Leon was under oncology (treatment and tests) for more than five years because his cancer had spread and he needed multiple operations. He was given the 'all clear' in 2007.
Rob's cancer was diagnosed earlier. He was given a large dose of chemotherapy and that's when the reality and the seriousness of the situation really hit home. "There were one of two moments I was wondering what would happen if the cancer spread," he said. "I felt like I was waiting for ever for the results to come back and someone to say 'you are all clear and there are no cancerous cells'."
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For Rob, social media was a great platform to be able to share the highs and the lows. "Not to play down how serious it was, I was able to let people know that it wasn't grinding me down," he said. "I wanted people to know that although I was in a serious place, I wasn't going to let that take over."
Image credit: Facebook/Ellen Toal
Finally, months after the start of oncology, he was given the 'all clear'. And the good news kept on coming from follow-up results.
Image credit: Supplied by Robert Toal
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Keeping his friends/family/supporters up to date on social media was all part of the journey. Image credit: Facebook/ Robert Toal
Since going through treatment, Rob's experience has resonated with his friends. His fight with cancer has had more of an impact on them than you may think. Sharing's caring after all. "Yeah, of course it's a bit weird that my mates think about me when they are checking themselves out, and then decide to tell me about it," he said. "But if it means that they are checking, I'm not so fussed."
And that's the point entirely. Rob argues that if you are ever in any doubt about your health, you should see your GP. "Don't just rely on the internet because, like me, you may not fit into certain categories," he explained.
Two years on, and Rob is living a normal life cancer-free and a lot has changed. He no longer lives to work. Finding comfort at work, he has stopped chasing the promotion and instead focuses on making sure that he spends as much time as he can with his family.
Featured image credit: Facebook/ Robert Toal
Featured Image Credit:Topics: Cancer