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Unfortunately for me, I'm now at an age where I have to accept that my hairline is gradually receding.
Ever so slightly, my hair is thinning and my 'widow's peak' is becoming more and more prominent.
Many of you will probably have noticed it happening to you, too.
I'm not too bothered about it, it was inevitable - may as well get on with it.
But I was curious as to why the fuck baldness seems to be far more prominent around the temples and on the crown of your head, as apposed to the sides and across the top.
Credit: Ageless Men's Health
Like, if you're going to take my hair, just take the lot. Don't fuck about making my life a misery by leaving a pathetic smattering of hair in random places.
Well, it's down to a mixture of genes and hormones.
If you start to notice baldness, go straight to the cue balls in your family and blame it on them. It is their genes that you have inherited which that make your hair follicles oversensitive to the hormone dihydrotestosterone (DHT), according to Share Care.
Your testosterone is converted into DHT, which causes your hair follicles to shrink, thus limiting the length to which you can grow your locks. Eventually, the hormone keeps shrinking the follicles until your hair gets finer and finer, and then eventually growth stops all together.
Unfortunately, it can happen at any age. I'd like to tell you that if you're going bald earlier than all of your mates, it's because you've got higher testosterone levels, but that's not the case.
You're just as manly as them, only your hair follicles are more sensitive to your hormones.
There's a certain makeup of protein on the crown of the head and around the temples which creates an increased amount of DHT. The hairs on the side of your head and across the top are spared of this and so they remain, making odd patterns in your hair.
This is why you'll end up with a widow's peak or just a random circle at the back of your head, as if someone has comically shaved your head while you sleep.
Of course there are remedies to male-pattern baldness. You could go down the Wayne Rooney route and wait until you're completely bald, then get a hair transplant.
Alternatively, there are medicines you can take to slow hair loss, such as Finasteride, a pill that blocks the conversion of testosterone into DHT.
There's also of course Regaine, and many other products similar. Regaine is apparently "scientifically proven to help stop and even reverse hereditary hair loss".
Worth a shot, I guess. Just rub it in your hair - it worked for Shane Warne, supposedly.
Words by Mark McGowan
Featured image credit: YTNGroup
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