Given that December ended with you pledging yourself to the gym, and now January has finished and the only exercise you've done is lifting chicken wings to your mouth, you're probably scrambling for a get-fit-quick option that requires no effort and no change in your diet.
It's unfortunate, really, because there isn't one. But let's face it, rather than working up a sweat, killing your legs and throwing your self two squats away from a stroke, it's preferable to sit on the sofa watching Alan Partridge re-runs, twiddling your nipples and wondering why you're not ripped yet. So here you are.
You can take solace in one thing though. Because if you look at it scientifically you lose weight on a daily basis. It's often overlooked how much weight you drop while having a poo.
I'm not kidding here, you actually do shed some weight dropping the kids off at the pool, and, if it's a tough one, the kind where you catch yourself in the bathroom mirror with your fists clenched and face beetroot red, then you're also sweating out additional weight.
It's obviously not a huge amount that you'll lose, but hey, if you set your goals low, then when you step off the throne and on to the scales feeling good about yourself.
Don't poo for a week and then squeeze it all out in one sitting and you'll feel really good about yourself.
A lot of important research has gone into this important subject. Researchers at the University of Cambridge went about collected data on stool weight from 20 populations in 12 countries when trying to find a correlation between the weight and risk of colon cancer. When the paper was published they found that your average deuce weighed between 2.5oz and one pound.
However, with the recent trend of people eating high fiber foods, shed loads of protein, as well as lots more fast food, Positive Med reported that at any given time a turd can weigh between one and four pounds.
Adina Pearson, RDN told Thrillist the words we all wanted to hear: "Yes, if you weighed yourself before and after a bowel movement, you would weigh less after," but then followed it up with the words we didn't want to hear, saying: "[but you] be slimmer or have less mass on your visible body."
Unfortunately, if now you're planning on downing a jar of curry sauce, along with raw eggs and a few laxatives, in order to poo your way to way to a glorious number on your scales, think on.
Though it's a technique used by some at even the highest levels of sport, laxative-driven weight loss isn't pretty and can have disastrous effects on the likes of the esophagus, gastrointestinal system, kidneys, skin and cardiovascular system.
So yeah, as you were wondering, turns out you do lose weight when you shit.
Featured Image Credit: Universal PicturesTopics: Weight