The force has been strong with Pornhub users over the past few days. You may or may not have noticed but May the Fourth has been and gone and it turns out people have been searching for all kinds of weird shit on the world's biggest adult website.
Our friends over at Pornhub Insights have been busy collating all the data they could on what changes when May the Fourth comes about.
Shockingly, people love searching for Star Wars porn parodies on the big day. And even more shockingly, Princess Leia in the golden bikini is not top of the list...
People searching 'Luke and Leia' need to fucking revise their life. That's a brother and sister for fuck sake. And 'Anal Lightsaber' too... what would your mother say if she saw your internet search history? Actually, don't answer that.
As you can imagine, there is a year-round appetite for Star Wars porn parodies but the spike on May the Fourth just shows how big a day it is for beating your meat to people dressed like they're from a galaxy far far away.
Now, we put our heads together in the office and decided to come up with a few possible Star Wars porn parody characters and titles for May the Fourth 2017. Just so the weirdos who search for 'Luke and Leia' have something that isn't incest to watch.
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- Jar Jar Bonks woman from Naboob
- Jabba the Butt all night
- Darth LaidHer
- Star Wars Episode Sex: The Return of The Creampie
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- Count Fucku
- Booby Fett the Booty Hunter
- Handjob Solo on the Millenium Falcock
- Chewbukkake
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- Jawa Wookie Creampie
- Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Girth
- Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hole
- R2inthepinkD2inthestink
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- C3P in my mouth
And I think we'll call it a day there. Shit got real dark in the group chat after that last one.
May the Fourth 2017 should be fun. We'll pass these on to Pornhub and see what they think.
Words by George Pavlou
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