Investigation Into Pilots Who Drew Penis In The Sky Reveals Full Story
Remember the giant penis drawn in the sky by a couple of pilots? Well, an investigation into the incident has finally revealed the full story behind it.
A report, obtained by the Navy Times, found that the two junior officers from the 'Zappers' of Electronic Attack Squadron 130 had a bit of spare time while flying over Washington state on 16 November 2017.
So, they decided to draw a massive cock and balls in the sky - however, the pair said they never expected it to be visible from the ground.
In the plane was a pilot and his co-pilot, an electronic warfare officer (EWO), neither of the men have been publicly identified.
In audio from the cockpit the EWO can be heard saying: "Draw a giant penis. That would be awesome."
The most monumental thing to happen in omak. A penis in the sky pic.twitter.com/SM8k1tNYaj
- Anahi Torres (@anahi_torres_) November 16, 2017
The pilot jokingly responds: "What did you do on your flight? Oh, we turned dinosaurs into sky penises."
"You should totally draw a penis," the first man replies back.
Seemingly egged on by the EWO, the pilot says: "I could definitely draw one, that would be easy. I could basically draw a figure eight and turn around and come back. I'm going to go down, grab some speed and hopefully get out of the contrail layer so they're not connected to each other."
Adding: "Dude, that would be so funny. Airliner's coming back on their way into Seattle, just this big fucking, giant penis. We could almost draw a vein in the middle of it too."
The pilot then set about creating the sky dick - warning the EWO the 'balls are going to be a little lopsided'.
He followed this by adding: "Balls are complete. I just gotta navigate a little bit for the shaft."
It's at this point, the EWO chips in to say that he reckons they will end up with a 'wide shaft', but the pilot seems to reassure him this is part of the plan, explaining: "I don't want to make it just, like, three balls."
"Let's do it," the EWO adds. "Oh, the head of that penis is going to be thick."
As the pilot finishes off his take on a Big Art Attack, the EWO says that he has a 'feeling the balls with have dissipated' by the time they get a chance to loop out and take a look at it.
But they didn't. In fact, the balls - and penis - hung around so long they were spotted by a number of people on the ground. Soon after photos were taken and shared online.
With the chem-trails not going anywhere, the pilot says it was then he realised he'd messed up.
According to the report, he wrote a statement which read: "Soon after, I realised the extent of our actions, that the contrails were remaining longer than predicted.
"I remarked that we needed to take steps to try to obfuscate it. I flew one pass over it essentially trying to scribble it out with my contrails. That pass was ineffective."
The reports adds that the men didn't get a chance to go back and 'eradicate the penis', because they had to go back to base as they were low on fuel.
Perhaps understandably, the squadron's commanding officer was reportedly 'immediately furious' when he found out about the incident and an investigation was launched.
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