Many of you will have had your fair share of dickhead landlords, who steal all your money without actually fixing anything they promise to - or insist on surprise room inspections when you've just woken up next to a one-night stand.
But none of them will be able to match up to this one and their frankly RIDICULOUS list of terms and conditions.
The unusual list was shared in the Facebook group 'Awful Roomates: Roomates from Hell' by someone called Jessica Marteny from North Carolina - who explained they weren't rules she had to live by (thank God), but that it was a list she'd spotted from another prospective landlord when searching for a place to live.
We get off to a fairly straightforward start, with the first point stipulating that tenants must be 'quiet, clean and respectful' - by which the landlord means 'staying out of the other rooms, maintaining hygiene, and not eating others' purchased food, i.e. being an adult'.
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Fair dos that that one, consider it done.
The second point states there will be 'NO DRINKING or DRUGS' on the properly at any time, which obviously sucks if you were hoping for a quiet glass of wine with dinner.
Then things start to ramp up a bit, with the rule that you must have absolutely 'NO GUESTS!!!'.
"No one is permitted on the property of those residing at the residence," the list says.
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"Rides must stop at the end of the driveway and let you off accordingly. If your ride lingers or comes onto the driveway it is considered trespassing and will be handled as such due to posted signs on property."
Jesus. Wow.
The list continues with other nuggets like 'NO SPACE HEATERS!', 'DO NOT adjust the thermostat', 'Windows must remain closed at all times while the heat or air-conditioning is on' and 'No cooking of food during the hours of 9:30pm to 6:00am on weekdays and between the hours of 9:30pm to 9:30am on weekends'.
But... But what if you need a midnight feast to energise you for the rest of your Netflix binge? What if - God forbid - you want breakfast earlier than 9.30am at a weekend? Unlikely, I know, but it's the principle.
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It gets arguably weirdest with the sixth point, which states: "The property is under 24-hour video surveillance. This is for your protection and for mine. This includes IR during the night as well."
Doesn't sound creepy at all, does it?
The list then goes out with a bang, concluding: "If any of these terms are broken at any time you will be asked to leave immediately, and therefore forfeiting paid deposit and any prepaid rent. By signing this you are agreeing to these terms."
Other people wrrote in the group to comment on how absurd the terms and conditions were, with one asking: "Is this guy renting a prison cell?"
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Another said: "What if you have a partner? They can't come over???? And no cooking before 9:30 on a weekend? What if you work on the weekend in the morning and wanna cook breakfast?"
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