Poundland has launched a range of budget sex toys ahead of Valentine's Day.
The 'Nooky' collection is comprised of plenty to please both him and her, and best of all - everything's just a pound!!
OK, that was a lie, it all costs several pounds, but who really wants to live in a world where you can pick up a seven-inch dildo for a quid?
Still, the titillating toys are all dirt(y) cheap, with the most expensive items priced at £8 - which is just a little more than a quid per inch.
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A product description for the Bonkin' Bunny dildo reads: "Hop to it whenever you feel frisky and enjoy some bunny fun with the Nooky Bonkin' Bunny.
"You get double the pleasure with this fun-filled vibrator as the bullet shaft provides internal satisfaction, while the bunny ears tease and stimulate the clitoris bringing you a sensational two-in-one climax."
Butt plugs and finger vibrators are just £4, while clitoral vibrators and love beads cost double that.
A full breakdown of the range is as follows:
- Nooky finger vibrator - £4
- Nooky butt plug - £4
- Nooky 2in1 rabbit ring - £4
- Nooky vibrating love egg - £4
- Nooky seven-inch bonkin' bunny dildo - £8
- Nooky g-spot vibrator - £8
- Nooky bodysuit in white and black - £5
- Nooky boxers, two pack - £5
- Nooky love beads - £8
- Nooky clitoral vibrator - £8
So what are you waiting for? Get pounding with Poundland (why that slogan hasn't been adopted, I have no idea).
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Unfortunately, you can't buy them online, so you'll have to head in store.
Whether picking up a bag of beads to shove up/pull out of yours/someone else's a**e can be justified as 'essential shopping' I guess is a matter of perspective. They certainly aren't included in essentials hampers.
People seemed to find the X-rated toys rather amusing in a post on the Extreme Couponing and Bargaining UK Facebook page.
One person commented: "Is it found in the DIY section by any chance?"
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Another said: "Probably your last Valentine's Day with your girlfriend when you hand her Poundland presents. Don't think there will be any sexy time."
A third added: "Don't be fooled, the ribbed condoms don't taste anything like ribs.... never again."
If you feel a four pound butt plug won't be sufficient to spice up your love life in lockdown, you can find tips from a sex expert here.
Featured Image Credit: NookyTopics: UK News, Sex, Poundland, Valentine's Day