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Sex expert says there’s a reason some people like pain during sex

Home> Community

Published 20:47 27 Mar 2023 GMT+1

Sex expert says there’s a reason some people like pain during sex

The expert explains the blurry intersection between pleasure and pain

Rhiannon Ingle

Rhiannon Ingle

A sex expert - or sexpert if you will - has said there's a very scientific reason behind why some people like to experience pain during sex.

Dr. Nicole McNichols, also known as The Sex Professor, explained a little more behind the phenomenon and even went as far as to call it 'fundamentally human'. This takes 'hurts so good' to a whole new level... check it out:

The doc took to Instagram to share with her 24,000 followers the fine lines in which pleasure and pain collide during intercourse.

She began by asking viewers: "Did you know that pleasure and pain are intricately connected?"

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"Inflicting pain during sex should always be consensual and shouldn't be done if it's something you don't enjoy," she pointed out before getting into the nitty gritty.

"But," the expert continued, "for many people, certain types of pain really can hurt so good."

According to Nicole, this is because the sensations of both pleasure and pain are 'connected at a neurological level'.

Woah.

Pleasure and pain are 'connected at a neurological level'.
Anna Shvets / Pexels

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Nicole also explained that the difference between what makes a sensation feel pleasurable versus painful 'often just comes down to the thoughts and expectations that you assigned to the feeling'.

"For example," she said, "an object digging into your back might feel kind of painful and uncomfortable.

"But what if it's the hands of your lover giving you an intimate massage - that might feel amazing."

Other types of 'good pain' the expert identifies includes a 'partner pulling your hair', 'spanking' or maybe even some 'temperature play'.

Nicole ended her video by telling viewers to communicate with their partner 'if incorporating pain into your sex life is something you think you might enjoy'.

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"Don't feel ashamed," she added.

"[It] often just comes down to the thoughts and expectations that you assigned to the feeling."
cottonbro studio / Pexels

The expert finished the clip emphasising: "Remember that inflicting painful sensations is a whole different thing than actually causing physical harm."

"But," Nicole concluded, "ultimately, the pain-pleasure connection is fundamentally human."

Backing up Nicole's claims, Medical News Today confirms: "Healthy, mutually consenting adults sometimes seek to experience painful sensations as an 'enhancer' of sexual pleasure and arousal.

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"This can be as part of BDSM practices or simply an occasional kink to spice up one’s sex life."

The professionals also note that pain-pleasure crossover has a lot to do with how our brains function, explaining: "Pleasure and pain are both tied to the interacting dopamine and opioid systems in the brain which regulate neurotransmitters that are involved in reward- or motivation-driven behaviors."

So, there you have it, pain and pleasure are way more connected than you'd think.

Featured Image Credit: Shutterstock

Topics: Sex and Relationships, Health, Instagram

Rhiannon Ingle
Rhiannon Ingle

Rhiannon Ingle is a Senior Journalist at Tyla, specialising in TV, film, travel, and culture. A graduate of the University of Manchester with a degree in English Literature, she honed her editorial skills as the Lifestyle Editor of The Mancunian, the UK’s largest student newspaper. With a keen eye for storytelling, Rhiannon brings fresh perspectives to her writing, blending critical insight with an engaging style. Her work captures the intersection of entertainment and real-world experiences.

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