Featured Image Credit: Getty Stock Images
Topics: Health, Mental Health, TikTok
Anish Vij
More than a third of Brits have experienced negging and it's important to be aware when your partner might be using it.
Watch below to make sure it's not you:
Relationships of any kind are not easy to maintain and over a number of years issues can gradually build up without you realising.
Of course, many problems you can fix together, but if neither are aware then circumstances will either remain the same, or get worse.
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Those who are diagnosed with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) are more likely use the method, an expert has claimed.
NPD is defined as a mental illness and is generally associated with a 'pervasive pattern of grandiosity, need for admiration and lack of empathy', according to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-V).
Dr Justine Weber - who specialises in narcissistic abuse and trauma therapy - has taken to TikTok (@drjustineweber) to explain what negging is.
She describes it as a 'subtle tactic' while some might mistake for banter or a sense of humour.
According to stats from LoveHoney, 34 percent of people in the UK have been on the receiving end of it.
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According to Dr Weber 'negging is a type of subtle emotional abuse that builds up and then tears you down over time'.
She explains: "It's meant to make you question your worth, and doubt yourself.
"The word negging might not sound familiar to you, but I bet this does.
"'Wow, you look so pretty when you have makeup on'.
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"'Your friends are in such great shape, you should work out with them'.
"'I just don't get how you like that kind of music. It's so lame'.
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"'I'm actually surprised at how smart you are. I didn't expect that'."
"People who neg are incredibly insecure about themselves," Dr Weber continued.
"And they project onto you to make you feel like you're less than, therefore you're the lucky one because they're into you.
"This is not constructive criticism, it's not playful teasing.
"This is mean and an manipulation and a huge red flag. Don't let 'em get to you."
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"This is hugely popular with narcissists - they make you insecure so that they can more easily attack you," she said.
So you need to watch out for these five signs of negging from your partner:
1) They’re constantly giving you backhanded compliments
2) They won’t stop trying to get one-up on you.
3) They keep asking awkward 'questions'
4) Their constructive criticism sounds an awful lot like criticism
5) They’re constantly comparing you to others
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"Any time someone is mentally manipulating another person for their own personal gain, it’s one hundred percent abuse,” explains Jesse Kahn, LCSW, director and sex therapist at The Gender & Sexuality Therapy Center in NYC.
“Backhanded compliments are things that are said with the same tone of a compliment, but actually put the receiver down.”