Count Binface, the figure formerly known as Lord Buckethead, has announced that he's running for London Mayor in 2021, pledging to rename London Bridge 'Phoebe Waller' if he wins.
Count Binface, who is the alter-ego of British comedian Jon Harvey, shared his full manifesto for the 2021 London Elections on Twitter, saying: "It is a fully-costed suite of policies which marries fiscal responsibility, social awareness, and not being an anti-vaccine nutjob.
"This is my 21-Point Plan for '21...!"
In the thread, he outlined plans including 'London Bridge to be renamed after Phoebe Waller', 'no shop to be allowed to sell a croissant for more than £1', 'Sir David Attenborough to be placed on the Fourth Plinth' at Trafalgar Square, 'speaker phones on public transport to be banned' with offenders forced to watch the Cats movie every day for a year, and 'London to join the EU'.
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Count Binface also vowed that 'all government ministers' pay, including the mayor's, to be tied to that of nurses for the next 100 years' and 'loud snacks to be banned from theatres'.
He continued: "I will create a Smart Speaker's Corner, replacing the usual nutters who stand around at Hyde Park Corner with state-of-the-art technology that (a) understands the Earth is round, and (b) will perform a fart sound on command. The current incumbents can only do the latter.
"On one day every year, escalators on the Underground to be reversed, encouraging travellers to go up the down escalators and down the up ones, as a free gym and Gladiators simulator all in one."
Other points included allowing the Royal Family to keep 'one of Buckingham Palace, Kensington Palace, St James' Palace and Clarence House', gifting the rest to 'help eradicate homelessness'.
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"If the royals complain that one palace isn't enough, they will be forced to buy Crystal Palace FC," he said.
Sharing a link to his GoFundMe campaign, Count Binface added: "There you have it, Countbinistas. No other candidate offers such a varied programme.
"If this manifesto floats your boat, you can help me get onto the ballot for mayor by helping me raise the £10k deposit. All extra money raised will be donated to Shelter."
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Count Binface was a candidate for Uxbridge and South Ruislip in the 2019 general election against incumbent Prime Minister Boris Johnson.
Originally called Lord Buckethead, he changed his name due to copyright issues, tweeting in 2019: "I have since renounced my peerage, partly because I promised to abolish the Lords and I'm a politician who keeps my promises, and partly because of an unfortunate battle on the planet Copyright.
"This has left me unbowed but I have a new-found appreciation of the likes of Boss Cat, @WWE and @AFCWimbledon. While I was at it, I thought I'd give myself a promotion (I'm not a fool) and so I humbly present myself to you anew."
Featured Image Credit: PA
Topics: UK News, News, Politics
