Phillip Schofield reveals he was ‘so so close’ to killing himself and had ‘everything set up’ after controversy

Warning: This article contains discussion of suicide which some readers may find distressing.

Phillip Schofield has revealed in his TV return Cast Away on Channel 5 that he was ‘so so close’ to taking his own life.

The former This Morning host is making his TV return in a show that will see him stranded on a remote island for 10 days entirely on his own with no food or water.

This comes after he stepped down from This Morning in 2023 following what he described as an ‘unwise but not illegal’ affair with a young member of his team.

This resulted in a media uproar, with Schofield paying a reported ‘six figure sum’ to the young man he'd had the affair with for a non-disclosure agreement.

The former This Morning presenter first met the young man when he was 15, and got him work experience at ITV when he was 19.

The relationship is believed to have begun a year later, when Schofield was still married to his wife Stephanie Lowe.

In an early viewing of the first episode of Cast Away shown to LADbible, we can reveal that Schofield revealed on the show that, as a result of the scandal, he got ‘so so close’ to ending his life.

The presenter cut a forlorn figure in the first episode (Channel 5)

Whilst it is not explicitly worded by the former presenter, it is clearly implied that he had made plans to kill himself in the show.

He says, filming himself as he is appearing on the show with no cameramen, that his daughters Ruby and Molly were looking after him at the time.

He said he got ‘so, so close’. He went on to add: “I had everything in place, everything was set up and everything was ready”.

He added: “[His daughter] Molly said, ‘Do you imagine what this would do to us if you actually managed to pull this off? Imagine what would happen. Can you imagine what it would do to me if you did this on my watch’, and that was just enough to take a step back from the edge."

Schofield's return has faced a large amount of criticism (Channel 5)

“I could have been hospitalised. I had the option to be hospitalised, but then I thought, that’s going to get out. So I just raced to the family home and shut the gates.”

Regarding what the affair he deems a ‘mistake’, Schofield says in the episode: “It’s like the biggest grenade going off in your life, and you know you let people down, you’ve let yourself down, and it was unwise and (an) unprofessional thing to do.

“I will be forever sorry, I screwed up, I made a mistake, and I hurt the people around me.”

He went on to say regarding cancellation: “Cancellation is a funny old thing, because, if you’re cancelled, then that’s it. I assume you’re dead. You can’t do anything. everything you do is wrong”.

Phillip Schofield: Cast Away will air its first episode 9pm on Monday, September 30.

If you’ve been affected by any of these issues and want to speak to someone in confidence, please don’t suffer alone. Call Samaritans for free on their anonymous 24-hour phone line on 116 123.