Man Blames Cat For Getting His Wife Pregnant After It Poked Holes In Their Condoms
Published
While pets are known to provide happiness and joy, they can also wreak unintended carnage.
But you don't have to tell that to one bloke who will be soon welcoming another child into the world all because of their cat.
A man has posted his story to Reddit, explaining how after their first child, he and his wife decided to hold off on another until after the pandemic is over and give his partner enough time to recover from the pregnancy.
However, it seems like their cat had other plans.
User Playtonic1 wrote: "Our cat is an evil genius. I seriously think the greasy orange little s*** is still smarter than our nearly one year old. He gets into everything, and I do mean everything. No door, drawer, or cabinet can stop him, and if he knows where something he wants is he WILL find it.
"It's so bad that for weeks after adopting him I thought there was poltergeist in the house because each morning I'd wake up to find every single cabinet door in the kitchen wide open!"
He revealed that he and his wife decided to switch back to using condoms because the pill ended up making her nauseous.
That's where their fur ball came into the picture.
"My first f*** up was storing the condoms in the same drawer as the Q-tips, which he loves to get into and shred apart," the Reddit user said.
"He must have seen the box of Q-tips in the drawer when I put my rubbers away, because not even an hour later I stumbled upon a horrific scene of chewed plastic straws, shredded cotton fluff and shiny gold condom wrappers scattered around the gapping drawer that once contained them.
"I didn't think anything of it at the time and just cleaned up the destroyed Q-tips and put the condoms that had spilled everywhere back into their box without a concern in the world.
"We ended up having some sexy time later that night, and I vividly remember stumbling into the dark bathroom, opening said drawer, and blindly fumbling around in the box to pull out a condom (as was the routine) thinking nothing of what happened earlier.
"That is until fast forward a few weeks to just the other day, when my wife was complaining of nausea and tender breast. We immediately shoot each a concerned glance as this ain't our first rodeo, and she felt the same way before discovering her first pregnancy. She still had a half empty box of tests from the year before and decided to take one just to be sure. Followed by another one... and another one... all positive."
The bloke ran into the room where the condoms are kept and lo and behold he discovered some had teeth and claw marks.
It didn't take long to realise that the cat must have poked a hole in the condom they had used.
At least there will be a fun conception story to tell later on.
