Diagnosed narcissist says there are three ways you can tell for sure that you aren’t one
A diagnosed narcissist has laid out three key ways you can tell that you aren't one as he opens up about what it's like living with the condition.
There is much fascination about people whose brains work differently and the perspective they have on the world, and as such there has been a lot of interest in the subject.
Experts have come up with questions they say a narcissist couldn't answer honestly, as well as the things they do that will never make sense to other people.
But first things first, it might be helpful to work out what being a 'narcissist' actually means.
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What is a narcissist?
A narcissist is someone who has narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), which results in a person having an incredibly high sense of self-importance.
NPD is defined as a mental illness and is generally associated with a 'pervasive pattern of grandiosity, need for admiration and lack of empathy', according to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-V).
One of the best windows into what a narcissist is comes from a narcissist themselves.
Jacob Skidmore got diagnosed with NPD and has set about the task of explaining what it's actually like as he satisfies people's curiosity over life as a narcissist.
What has Jacob Skidmore said about narcissism?
Jacob previously opened up to LADbible about living with narcissism and how it affects him.
He said: "Nowadays I’m (obviously) very open about my condition but, since I was aware of the opinion most people had about it, I didn’t tell anyone for around two years.
"I know some people with NPD that have gone decades without disclosing it out of fear of judgement. That’s the issue with having such a shame driven disorder.
"It’s hard to tell anyone something that you think they’ll judge you for.
"Whenever I attempt to be vulnerable with my friends it’s like the shame catches the words in my throat and I psychically can’t say it.
"It’s a palpable terror at the idea of something thinking anything bad about me."
Speaking about how you could tell if you weren't a narcissist, Jacob previously made a video where he explained three main signs you could use to tell you didn't have NPD.
Jacob explained that he'd never met a narcissist who didn't 'do these things', though stressed that if you didn't think the signs applied to you it didn't mean you weren't a narcissist.
"Do you feel like your emotions are genuine?"
This was his first question for people if they wanted to know they weren't a narcissist.
"Because for me, whether it comes to a funeral or my friend going through a breakup or it comes to me being happy for somebody's achievement, I'm faking emotions all the time, because I know what's what's expected of me," he explained.
"Narcissists don't have those normal emotional reactions, we have to emulate them half the time."
"Do you think every person in the world has equal inherent worth?"
According to Jacob, this is the second thing you need to think about if you want to know you're not a narcissist.
He said: "Narcissists, think hierarchically. It's an inconceivable to us that two people can have it inherently the same amount of worth. For me, there's always gonna be a better person and a person below."
Then there was the third and final question...
"Do you love yourself?"
"A lot of people think narcissists love themselves," Jacob said of the common perception around NPD.
"No, we think we're better than everybody else. We might love how we look. We might love our intelligence. But my internal monologue is a constant stream of 'You're so stupid. Why did you do that?
"You're better than all these other people. How could you be so stupid?' There is no self love. There is no self compassion there. It's just grandiosity."
He did stress that he was 'not a clinician' and could only speak to his own experience, so anyone wanting to know whether they were a narcissist or not should go and get a diagnosis instead of trying to work it out themselves.
Additional words by Anish Vij
Topics: Mental Health, Health, Social Media
Joe Harker