Expert shares the six questions that a narcissist can't truthfully answer
An expert has revealed the six questions that a narcissist can't answer truthfully.
Someone with the mental health condition known as narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) can be defined as an individual with an increased sense of self-importance, a deep need for admiration, and a lack of empathy for others.
People with NPD have fragile self-esteem and often struggle to maintain long-term relationships due to their one-track mindset of doing everything for themselves.
According to research carried out by the BBC, it is estimated that one in 20 people in the UK have NPD, though the number of undiagnosed cases could be higher.
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Narcissists have explained the most common traits you can find in them, so that you can identify it early on in friendships or relationships, but what about things that they don't want to hear?
An expert has taken to YouTube to reveal the six questions that narcissists can't answer honestly, which she says might 'surprise' you, as they don't actually have an answer for everything.
What makes you happy?
Christina, a toxic relationship recovery coach, explained that if a narcissist was to answer this honestly, they would say 'nothing', as they 'tend to look for things' that make them feel happy, which can often be a new relationship.
Speaking about how it would apply to relationships, she explained: "You were once the 'thing', the supply that made the narcissist happy and this would have been in the idealisation phase... right before the devaluation phase where things start falling apart."
She highlighted that happiness is up to the person, regardless of external factors, as a narcissist is likely to give you different answers to this question if you ask them months apart.
Why do you keep discarding me and coming back?
She highlighted that narcissists discard people, leaving relationships suddenly before attempting to come back weeks or months later.
However, she explained that they 'can't, for the life of them, explain why they're doing it', and that they could shrug it off as a ridiculous question.
"They give you the impression that they're trying so hard but it's not working because there's something wrong with you," she revealed.
What would you change about yourself?
She said that the kind of answer you can expect from a narcissist here is 'along the lines of': "Why mess with perfection?"
A joke at face value, but very narcissistic below the surface - she highlighted further than a vulnerable narcissist may give you a more honest answer, such as 'I can't really change', or that they would change their eye colour - basically nothing too deep.
Why do you deserve 'X'?
Asking a narcissist why they feel that they deserve something that they may feel entitled to will likely result in them not having an answer, because they naturally feel this way.
Usually, people will feel they have earned something, such as a job promotion, but she explained: "A narcissist doesn't do those things, they might say 'oh yeah I worked really hard', or something like that, but it's not actually true.
"They can't give you a true answer to why they are entitled to something because it's just who they are by nature," Christina said.
What is love?
Most people will have a perception of what love is, but a narcissist may struggle - another way to frame this if you're in a relationship without someone is to ask 'why do you love me?' or 'what do you love about me?'
Christina explained: "They often confuse lust with love, and they definitely confuse infatuation with love, but these things aren't love, these are things that fade away over time.
"And this confusion is why a narcissist will, so early on, profess their love to you, because they think that's what love is."
Highlighting that it isn't like this, as most people usually start to love someone and accept all their flaws after being together for a while, she said this is where narcissists 'check out'.
"Without sufficient emotional empathy it's very difficult to have those deep meaningful connections with other people," she stated.
Why won't you answer my question?
This is one for an argument with a narcissist, where they are constantly dodging a question that you want the answer to.
Saying that asking a narcissist can lead the conversation to 'go in circles', you'll usually end up where you started, or somewhere different, Christina says.
Narcissists often start spewing nonsense, or 'word salad', a mix of things that you'll get when they avoid accountability.
"As far as they're concerned there are no answers," she damningly said.
If you ask any of the above questions for example, they might dodge answering it, or you may be met with frustration as they don't have an answer, meaning they could lash out at you.
Topics: Mental Health, YouTube, Community
Joshua Nair