Woman who split up with husband and slept with 200 men after cancer diagnosis left touching message after death
A woman who left a legacy of sexual liberation behind after passing away from terminal cancer also left a touching message for her supporters.
Molly Kochan passed away in March 2019 when she was just 45, more than a decade after she first went to the doctor with a lump in her breast.
Six years after raising her concerns with her GP, she was diagnosed with breast cancer - which had tragically spread to her lymph nodes, and later to her bones, brain and liver.
Despite undergoing a double mastectomy as well as intense chemotherapy and radiation treatment, Molly's cancer was sadly incurable.
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After she received the devastating news in 2015, the Los Angeles resident took an unconventional route when it came to making the most of the time she had left.
At the time, Molly and her husband of 15-years were in couple's counselling - but she decided to walk away from her loveless marriage in favour of 'seeking joy'.
What this translated to was a mission to sleep with as many men as she wanted, as she explained that sex made her 'feel alive' as well as being a 'great distraction' from her ill health.
Molly's extraordinary story is now being retold in a TV miniseries, Dying For Sex, which stars Oscar-nominee Michelle Williams. Take a look at the trailer here:
Prior to her death, Molly revealed that her and her former husband had 'difficulties' in the bedroom 'before cancer came along' - so she was keen to make up for lost time following her terminal diagnosis.
"I don’t think I would do any of this stuff without the cancer," Molly said prior to her death. "Even though I’d maybe want to, I’d be a little more cautious about everything."
In the end, she racked up more than 183 sexual conquests - including a Ryan Reynolds lookalike, a fella with a foot fetish and a mortician who terrifyingly sported clown make-up - over the years, and ended up losing count of her lovers.
The author and her best friend, Nikki Boyer, decided to document her goal of getting as many notches on her bedpost as possible in 2018, by recording a six-part podcast, aptly named Dying for Sex.
Molly - who was left 'horny all the time' due to hormone treatment for the menopause - also penned a memoir, Screw Cancer: Becoming Whole, about her journey.
The podcast was released a year after Molly's passing and has since been downloaded a whopping five million times, although her pal Nicki reckons Molly had no 'clue [about] how profoundly it was going to land in the world'.
"She would always say sex felt like the antithesis to death," Nicki told The Times. "Being physically on fire made her feel alive. A lot of people think, ‘She’s just having sex, f***ing around to make herself feel good'.
"But it wasn’t just about that. There was healing of old wounds. Her whole life she felt fragmented and during sex she was allowed to make her own choices and put the pieces together for herself."
Molly opened up on the Dying for Sex podcast about her traumatic childhood and alleged that one of her mum's boyfriend's abused her when she was just seven.
Nikki was sat alongside her best pal as she took 'her last breaths' on 8 March, 2019 - which is the date that Molly's final ever post was shared on her blog named 'everything leads to this'.
She delved into her unique bucket list of sex-capades in the light-hearted but poignant post, which was titled 'I have died', telling supporters that her antics 'brought her joy' in her final days.
"So many people who die, specifically of cancer it seems, write viral letters about embracing life," Molly wrote. "Eat an avocado every day. Tell your mean neighbor his lawn looks nice.
"Don’t hesitate, quit your job, go to Bora Bora. And then they go on to tell you about the last few months of their lives under palm trees, with a once scabies-infected dog.
"Often accompanied by an impossibly healthy looking person and partner," Molly continued. "I don’t have those kinds of life lessons to share. I know what I did at the end of my life.
"I know what brought me joy. But my list would surely not affect you."
She reassured her loved ones that her 'last days were great' and that she was surrounded by 'the people who were meant to be there'.
Molly also revealed she was still 'putting pressure' on herself to complete things as she felt herself slipping away, although she acknowledged she had 'no control' over what happened next.
"I get angry when I can’t sit up to type," she said. "There are projects I am hoping to finish before I go. But I have no control over any of that. The only thing I can work on is being without the guilt of not doing.
"Accepting that my days are what they were," Molly said. "As a side note, if you are angry at me for not reaching out, totally understandable. My death process had to be a small and contained one.
"I likened it to a death dinghy. As I floated farther from the shore, I knew one more body would throw off the beautiful balance and safety I worked hard to create.
"That’s not to say that the love and connections we shared weren’t real. They all were. But if you need to get p***ed at me, go for it. I think I might if I read this note from a good friend who was suddenly not there."
Dying For Sex is available to watch on Hulu and Hulu on Disney+.
If you’ve been affected by any of these issues and want to speak to someone in confidence, contact Macmillan’s Cancer Support Line on 0808 808 00 00, 8am–8pm seven days a week.
Olivia Burke