Anish Vij
A man who has been diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) has revealed the 'real reason why you probably aren't one'.
Jacob Skidmore, known as The Nameless Narcissist online, has opened up about the distinction between having narcissistic thoughts occasionally and being a genuine narcissist.
The US-based content creator, who has over 300,000 followers across his social media accounts, said he didn't tell anyone about his NPD diagnosis for years.
"Whenever I attempt to be vulnerable with my friends, it’s like the shame catches the words in my throat and I psychically can’t say it," he told LADbible back in 2023.
NPD is a mental health condition that gives an increased sense of self-importance, a deep need for admiration, and a lack of empathy for others.
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And since Jacob has become more open about his condition, he has put to bed many misconceptions about NPD.
In a video uploaded to his TikTok page, Jacob explained: "A lot of people will be like, 'Oh, I have those thoughts too sometimes. Does that mean I'm a narcissist?' And the answer is probably no, and it's not because necessarily that, 'Oh, if somebody considers they're a narcissist, that means that they're not a narcissist'.
"I mean, obviously I've considered it, been considering it for a while, been diagnosed with it."
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He said the 'real reason why you probably aren't a narcissist' is because these thoughts have to apply 'to literally everything in your life'.
"Not just 'Oh, man, I got a promotion at work, so I'm feeling a little grandiose and thinking a little narcissistically'," Jacob added.
"No, it's, 'Oh, I took in the groceries today better than anybody who's ever existed'."
Jacob said that narcissistic thoughts must be pervasive and ego-based, meaning there's no self-judgment involved.
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True narcissists don't feel the need to hide their thoughts or feel guilty about them, as they believe their behaviour is justified, he says.
Jacob continued: "Like me, for example. I know that these thoughts are abnormal, but I don't have any cognitive dissonance regarding them. I'm not like, 'Oh, man, I can't believe I thought this narcissistic thought today'. No, I'm thinking, 'Everybody should think like this'."
He added: "And a much more normal response for narcissists to had to being confronted with these thoughts isn't, 'Oh, I can't believe they know that I think this. I can't believe behind these thoughts', it's, 'Everybody thinks like this. Everybody just hides it'.
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"That's what most narcissists think before they're diagnosed. And I think that's one of the key differences between a genuine narcissist and someone thinking or acting narcissistically in a given moment.
"A genuine narcissist thinks it's okay and justified to be a narcissist."