An inebriated driver was seen spraying Axe body spray into his mouth, seemingly to try and mask the scent of alcohol on his breath, cops have said.
If you're not familiar with Axe, it's the US name for the brand Lynx. Yep, this fella is alleged to have tried to hide his drunkenness by spraying some Lynx Africa (or a similar, equally appealing fragrance) in his mouth, which is surely worse than any sentence that could be handed out to someone anyway...?
The 49-year-old driver was pulled over in Spartanburg County, South Carolina, on Saturday night after cops spotted him speeding and swerving into another lane, The State reports.
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But as they approached the vehicle they spotted him doing something pretty weird. According to the Spartanburg County Sheriff's Office report, the man, named as Efren Mencia-Ramirez, "was spraying Axe body spray in his mouth when (the deputy) approached to cover the smell of alcohol on his breath."
Upon further inspection, cops also spied a 12-pack of beer on the floor of the passenger side of the car, with 11 of the dozen open - 10 were reportedly nearly empty.
Mencia-Ramirez, who is probably counting his blessings that America's Dumbest Criminals isn't still airing, was sat with an open bottle of beer between his legs, smelled of alcohol (despite his best efforts) and showed signs of intoxication while talking to cops, the Sherriff's report states.
Once hauled into the station Mencia-Ramirez gave a breath sample which showed that he had a .15 blood alcohol content, nearly twice the legal limit for driving in South Carolina.
He was charged with driving under the influence, having an open container of booze, no proof of insurance and no valid South Carolina driving licence.
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Of course, what makes this whole weird story even more nonsensical is the fact that the body sprays contain alcohol, so all he reasonably could have succeeded in doing (other than potentially killing himself) was to have made matters worse.
It goes without saying, but please don't attempt to use Lynx as breath spray, it's not big or clever or delicious.
Featured Image Credit: Spartanburg County Sheriff's Office