Contestant reflects on moment he was told he was dating transgender woman on hugely controversial dating show
Warning: This article contains discussion of discrimination against the LGBTQ+ community and suicide which some readers may find distressing.
A contestant from the controversial Sky reality show There's Something About Miriam has spoken out about the backlash it received, and who the blame should be on.
The 2004 reality TV show followed six men fighting for the love of a young, Brazilian model through competing in physical events, with the winner getting a luxury yacht trip and a cash prize of £10,000.
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A Channel 4 documentary Miriam: Death of a Reality Star was recently released to retell the story of the model in question, Miriam Rivera, a transgender woman who the reality show was based around.
The catch was that producers didn't tell contestants that she was born a male, making her announce it to them in the final episode of the series.
In the controversial scene, Miriam speaks to all six contestants after picking 23-year-old Tom Rooke as her winner.
She explains: "I tried to be honest with all of you as much as I can. Yes, I'm from Mexico, I'm a model and I'm 21.
"But, Tom, I really love spending time with you. I love men and I love being a woman.
"But I'm not a woman, I was born as a man."
Shockingly, the men began to laugh as Miriam opened up about her gender identity, with friends of the model later claiming that the producers put her up to the admission, unaware of how poorly it would be received.
The new documentary examines this incident, the life of the model and the occurrence of her apparent suicide in her apartment in Mexico in 2019.
One of the contestants, Toby Green, spoke to Mail Online about the incident, placing the blame on the show's creators, Endemol: "We all felt deceived and wronged by the programme makers who set out to deceive us. We all felt we had been manipulated."
Being just 23-years-old when he appeared on the show, Toby continued: "We were offered the chance to go on the programme - six heterosexual guys being offered the chance to chat up pretty women. It seemed light-hearted and I thought it would be a bit of fun.
"If I'm truthful, at the time I suspected that Miriam might be transgender, though I wasn't 100% sure," he claims.
In fact, the documentary reveals Toby sharing these thoughts with the other contestants as they laughed it off, before producers stepped in to keep the secret under wraps.
The ex-contestant acknowledged that he wasn't as invested, as he was voted out of the house first, saying that 'Scott and Tom were very much more affected', as the news 'hit them hard'.
"It was a terrible thing to do and it did it have an impact on everyone but especially Miriam who ultimately lost her life. She committed suicide."
Toby stated that he wants to see an advisory body to check on the actions of reality shows like this, explaining: "TV shows always try and push the boundaries but in this case what Endemol did was totally unacceptable and we all thought it was terrible."
Since his first reality TV appearance, he has steered clear of any other appearances on our screens, only speaking out now to help Miriam's family following her death and the release of the documentary.
"It's one way I can help them. I want to speak out about it for her family's sake," he stated.
One contestant went on to smash up the luxury villa after the news, treatening to 'kill' the model.
The documentary explores how the model was demonised instead of the show's producers, and how she turned to a life of sex and drugs before her death.
All six contestants were furious following filming, and tried to mount a legal case against the production company.
They alleged conspiracy to commit sexual assault, defamation, breach of contract, and personal injury in the form of psychological and emotional damage, but ultimately settled for an undisclosed amount.
A number of colourful details about Miriam's life are revealed in the documentary too, detailing how much abuse and struggle she went through before and after the show.
All episodes of Miriam: Death Of A Reality Star are available to stream on All4 now.
If you’ve been affected by any of these issues and want to speak to someone in confidence, contact the LGBT Foundation on 0345 3 30 30 30, 10am–6pm Monday to Friday, or email [email protected].
If you’ve been affected by any of these issues and want to speak to someone in confidence, please don’t suffer alone. Call Samaritans for free on their anonymous 24-hour phone line on 116 123.
Topics: LGBTQ, Mental Health, TV, Channel 4
Joshua Nair