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Dating expert reveals biggest reason why women stop having sex with their husbands

Dating expert reveals biggest reason why women stop having sex with their husbands

It speaks to a deeper problem in the relationship that needs addressing.

A dating expert has spoken out on the 'primary reason' why married couples stopped having sex.

Relationship expert Dr Sarah Hensley runs The Dating Decoder, a platform which uses the science of attachment to give people plans of action in their relationships.

One of the issues she's tackled is why the sex dries up for some married couples, and why women might not want to have sex with their husbands.

Plenty of studies indicate that married couples generally have plenty of sex, contrary to certain stereotypes which go around, but there are some couples who end up having a tepid existence in the bedroom after they tie the knot.

This speaks to a deeper problem in their relationship and Dr Hensley explained what she thinks the reasons behind this are.

"I'm sick of the sight of you, maybe sort that out first."
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Why do married women stop having sex with their husbands?

Speaking in a recent video on TikTok, Dr Hensley spoke about the main reason married couples stopped having sex, or 'seggs' as she wrote it to avoid the site's censors.

She said: "Primary reason why women stop having sex with their husbands is they don't feel emotionally safe, and the reason they don't feel emotionally safe is because their attachment needs are not being met inside of their relationship.

"Attachment needs are our deepest needs inside of a romantic relationship and if those things are not fulfilled we will not feel emotionally safe.

"Especially for women when there is a lack of emotional safety they start feeling very unsafe giving their bodies to their partner and they start to feel extremely unattracted to their partner.

"They simply can't get turned on physically turned on by their partners any more."

If your partner doesn't feel emotionally safe around you it's unlikely they'll be happy with you.
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How can married couples have a healthy sex life?

The dating expert explained how you could avoid this happening to your relationship as she said the first step was knowing the 'attachment style of your partner'.

Basically, different partners have different ways of getting their needs met and Dr Hensley explains this in some of her other videos and once you know what your partner needs lots of in a relationship, that's the key.

Give them what they need, make them feel safe and be a partner they'd feel comfortable being around and it sounds like the rest will follow.

Hensley explained different people have different attachment styles and need different things to feel happy in a relationship:

  • Anxious preoccupied - People with this attachment style need 'lots of reassurance every single day that you love them, that the relationship is stable and that you are appreciative of them', according to Hensley
  • Fearful avoidant - These guys need 'a lot of space for their feelings' and need to feel 'seen, heard and understood'
  • Dismissive avoidant - These partners need 'space, autonomy and lack of criticism', along with 'peace and harmony' in the relationship'

Other relationship experts have said you also need to keep the novelty in the relationship to stop things from becoming stale and you falling into a rut.

Another expert said it was crucial to be making 'deposits in each other's emotional bank accounts', as the alternative was neglect and eventually breaking up.

Featured Image Credit: TikTok/@the_dating_decoder/Getty Stock Photo

Topics: Sex and Relationships, TikTok