Psychologist shares the five signs to look out for that show you’re in a relationship with a narcissist
A psychologist has shared the top signs to look out for if you think you could be dating a narcissist.
A narcissistic personality disorder is a mental health condition in which a person has an unreasonably high sense of their own self-importance.
There are a number of criteria that can help define a narcissist, such as a sense of entitlement, lack of empathy, the need for excessive admiration, arrogance and envy of others.
But how can you spot narcissistic behaviour in a relationship?
Advert
Well, psychologist Dr Sarah Davies has revealed the red flags to look out for.
In her book, How to Leave a Narcissist … For Good, Sarah explains, via The Times: "Narcissism is a defence against deep and intense feelings of shame.
"For a narcissist it is simply too psychologically unbearable to connect with this shame and deep inner pain, so they rely on a variety of mental and psychological defence mechanisms and destructive, abusive behaviours."
Sarah lists five signs to look out for:
1. Denial
Sarah explains that an inability to accept or acknowledge any truth, is often a red flag.
"The level of denial in a narcissist, and the absolute assurance that often accompanies it, can be quite alarming," she says.
2. Fishing
Sarah explains this as when a narcissist 'throws out emotional 'hooks'.
She adds: "They will be attuned into using the exact bait necessary to catch and reel in their target. It can be helpful to identify for yourself what kinds of bait leave you vulnerable. For example: is it your feelings of guilt?"
3. Finger-pointing
Sarah reminds us that a narcissist never takes responsibility for their actions and very rarely apologises.
"They will instead attempt to keep any accusations, blame or responsibility away from them by pointing out what anybody and everybody else is doing or not doing," she adds.
4. Love bombing
Love bombing happens when someone is lavished with attention or affection, in order to manipulate them.
"Overwhelming others with affection and attention, compliments, praise and gifts in order to gain their interest and 'love'," explains Sarah.
"The aim of love bombing is ultimately to manipulate and control."
5. Topping
Sarah explains that 'topping' - also known as 'upping' is a common habit for narcissists, who like to one up anything else that someone owns, or has achieved.
"This serves to quickly return the focus of attention and admiration to them," she says.
"Narcissists find it difficult to tolerate enjoying the success or achievements of others."
Topics: Sex and Relationships
Lucy Devine