British tourist complains he’s a 'solid seven' out of 10 in London but a five in Australia

A British man who visited Australia says the country is a little too beautiful for his liking.

Jack Kessler has penned a column in the London Evening Standard about his three week vacation down under over the Christmas period.

He initially loved Sydney for the weather, the laid-back attitude, the fact that the C-bomb is a 'term of endearment' and the general vibe of the city.

However, that perspective started to change when his flip flops started giving him blisters, he couldn't find a place that serves coffee after 3:30pm and he was worried about Australia's international defence system.

But what was most apparent after a few weeks of living in Sydney's eastern suburbs was how everyone looked.

"Everyone is beach body-ready, so as a solid seven in London I was demoted to a five, five and a half on a good hair day (which never happened, thanks to my sun hat)," he said in the column.

"I took my shirt off at the pool and yearned to assure the locals that, actually, I’m in reasonable shape for London."

There's no denying that Sydney's beaches are filled with people during the summer months.

Some of them appear to be in fantastic shape and others come in other shapes and sizes.

It certainly doesn't help that Bondi's open-air gym is regularly filled with people who could go in bodybuilding competitions.

A quick look at the comments section on the Evening Standard were brutal.

One person wrote: "Pasty Englishman stays in Sydney’s most expensive beachside suburbs and develops insecurity complex, possibly brought on by a lack of coffee after 3pm, and fear of a one-sided nuclear war.”

Another added: "The nice clean fresh air and ocean views and sandy beaches were not a match for the gloominess or the thick air of London underground."

Jack responded to the criticism on Twitter, writing: "Commenters on the Evening Standard Facebook page are adamant I’m not a ‘seven’ in any time zone. Brutal business, this."

He also added: "Fair amount riding on the hope my Australian in-laws know I don't write the headlines."

The headline for the Evening Standard article reads 'I thought I loved Australia — until I spent more than two weeks there'.

Hopefully he gets another chance to come to Australia and feel like the solid seven he feels he is.

Featured Image Credit: Jack Kessler/Twitter. robertharding / Alamy Stock Photo

Topics: Australia

Stewart Perrie

Stewart Perrie is a Senior Journalist at LADbible. Stewart has covered the conflict in Syria for LADbible, interviewing a doctor on the front line, and has contributed to the hugely successful UOKM8 campaign. He is in charge of the LADbible Australia editorial content and social presence.

@stewartperrie