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Topics: Health, Lifestyle, Mental Health
Joshua Nair
A palliative care nurse has revealed the five most common regrets she found with people in their final days.
Despite all of the stigma around death, most end-of-life medical experts have shared that it is usually a positive time, with the individual often reflecting on their life after accepting mortality.
A lot of people near the end of their days might say the same couple of things, but this palliative care expert has shared what they experienced with their patients who chose to go home to pass away peacefully.
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They said: "I was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives.
"People grow a lot when they are faced with their own mortality. I learned never to underestimate someone’s capacity for growth."
But there were five main regrets that they found in their years of experience, and here they are.
"This was the most common regret of all," the end-of-life expert revealed.
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Patients wished they lived a life that was true to themselves, instead of what others expected from them, after reflecting.
They notice how many of their dreams went unfulfilled, not even trying at some of them, accepting their death knowing they decided not to pursue their dreams.
This will come as a message to many young professionals out there, but the nurse said that every male patient admitted on their deathbed that they missed their youth and companionship with their partner due to work.
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Some women also spoke about it, but as they were from an older generation where men were the breadwinners, it comes as no surprise that they felt that they worked too hard.
A lot of people suppressed their feelings back in the day, and did it often to keep peace and relationships with other.
However, it resulted in what the nurse called a 'mediocre existence', as they never lived up to the person that they were actually capable of becoming, unfortunately.
Patients would often only realise the positives that old friends bring in their dying weeks, when it would be a tough task to track them down as each person got engulfed by their own lives and agendas.
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"There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved," the medical expert stated.
This was another common one, as many of them didn't realise that happiness was ultimately a choice, and a fear of change had them lying to themselves that they were content with life.
The nurse explained: "Deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again. When you are dying, what others think of you is a long way from your mind."
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The professional highlighted that this has to be a message to younger generations to ensure they don't make the same mistakes, and to be in control of where their life and happiness goes.