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Topics: Mental Health, Sex and Relationships, Weird
Olivia Burke
Topics: Mental Health, Sex and Relationships, Weird
Sometimes it's not even a person's ridiculously loud chewing or irksome heavy breathing which makes you want to punch them in the face - it might just be their affective presence.
We're all humans and no one is perfect, but some people really just seem to get your goat more than others.
Even though they are probably just innocently going about their business, the mere presence of certain individuals seems to get on our very last nerve.
Their voice is like nails on a chalkboard and you'd rather stick pins in your eyes than look at them for too long, but all of this venom you feel towards them bizarrely does have a valid origin story.
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For those who currently have a mental image of their unnecessary arch nemesis, there is some good news - it's likely you are not just a hater, but in fact, might be merely experiencing a psychological phenomenon.
It turns out that there is a concept called 'affective presence', which could explain why some specific humans really irritate us for no apparent reason.
Psychologists Noah Eisenkraft and Hillary Anger Elfenbein first brought it up in a study they conducted in 2010, which aimed to work out how much individuals consistently influence the way other people feel.
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According to their findings, some people exert a prominent emotional impact on those around them, which can massively impact how their peers feel - whether they're relaxed, or really uncomfortable.
The term 'affective presence' refers to how a person simply being in the same room as others makes the rest of the crowd feel, regardless of their own emotions or intentions.
It's the feeling that people are left with after interacting with you - do they walk away grinning and calling you a little ray of sunshine, or whisper that your a moody cow while making a mental note to swerve you next time?
For want of a more sophisticated sounding term, it's whether they pass the vibe check.
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According to Eisenkraft and Elfenbein's research, a person's affective presence is dictated by how they manage and communicate their own emotions.
When looking at what the difference is between people leaving positive and negative lasting impressions, the results suggested that it was down to the expressive style of an individual.
Some might be kind and warm to converse with, while another may feel abrasive and aggressive.
S,o if you've got a serious bone to pick with someone but it's completely unwarranted, it might be because of their issues with their own expressive style rather than you nitpicking.
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But if you reckon you're the accidentally annoying one, don't panic and think you're doomed to be a negative Nancy for the rest of your life.
According to cognitive neuroscientist Dr Christian Jarrett, we have the power to alter out affective presence.
He told the Huffington Post: "If you would like to develop a more open-minded, sociable, warm personality, an important way to achieve this is to strive to place yourself into situations that lift your mood.
"This may sound obvious, but if you think honestly for a moment, how often are you strategic when planning your time?"
Dr Jarrett advises people to search for joy where possible - even if it means going out and finding it for yourself rather than succumbing to the negativity.
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He added: "Try making a greater effort to plan ahead and seek out the sunlit places that promise more joy.
"A simple rule of thumb may be to try to pursue any activities and company that help you to behave as outgoing and friendly as possible."