Former Nickelodeon star Jennette McCurdy has revealed shocking new details about her volatile relationship with her mother while on the press tour for her best-selling book I’m Glad My Mom Died.
The former child star's memoir details the physical, mental, and sexual abuse she suffered at the hands of her own mother. It was released in August and skyrocketed to the number one spot on the New York Times Best Seller list for that month.
The 30-year-old, who is most well known for her hit TV show, iCarly, recently sat-down on Jada Pinkett-Smith’s Red Table Table Talk.
Jennette revealed that as her mother was diagnosed with cancer when she was two, her behaviour became increasingly more controlling.
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The former teen star shared how her mother pushed Jennette into acting at a young age, trying to live her dreams through her daughter viciously.
She shared how her mother’s controlling behaviour manifested in Jennette developing an eating disorder. Deb informed the starlet that if she wanted to keep booking roles, she needed to stay thin.
While in hindsight, Jennette realises how ‘disturbing’ it was; at the time, calorie counting with her mum felt like a ‘bonding’ experience.
"We were just in the disease, in the sickness. But there was a connection that the sickness created that I, of course, couldn't see at the time," she said.
But as doctors became increasingly concerned that Jennette was underweight, her mother consistently assured them nothing was wrong.
The 30-year-old also read a shocking email from her late mum.
In the letter, her mother had labelled her a ‘s**t’ after discovering TMZ photos of her online.
She reads: “I am so disappointed in you.
“You used to be my perfect little angel, but now you are nothing more than a little s**t, a floozy, all used up. And to think - you wasted it on that hideous ogre of a man.”
She added: “You look pudgier too. It’s clear you’re eating your guilt. Thinking of you with his ding-dong inside of you makes me sick. Sick! I raised you better than this. What happened to my good little girl? Where did she go and who is this monster that has replaced her? You’re an ugly monster now.”
The letter was also signed ‘Mom (or should I say Deb since I am no longer your mother)’ and concluded with her demanding money as her fridge broke.
Despite suffering years of anguish over her relationship, Jennette shared she was eventually able to ‘forgive’ her mother after intense therapy.
She explained: “My therapist said to me one day, 'What if you don't have to work toward forgiveness?'
“And I wept and I knew that that's what I needed to hear because I had been trying to find a way to still honour and respect, I was still trying to live for her. I was still trying to find a way to make it all mean something because it had to. It was hugely emotional but my God did it help."
Charisa Bossinakis