Woman Says She's Been Impregnated By An Alien From The Year 3500
A woman says she time travelled to the year 3500 and got impregnated by an alien.
So, questions: How did she time travel? How did she get impregnated by an alien? What is her name? Where is she from? Why isn't she the subject of a major scientific investigation?
Well, I'm afraid we don't really have answers to any of those questions, nor do we have any evidence or explanations.
However, we do have a video of a pixelated woman talking from a chair perched on an indeterminate patch of ground, so let's just dive right into what she had to say for herself.
The woman claims her remarkable story started out when she was an 18-year-old, studying chemistry at university in Paris. She was offered a laboratory job by one of her professors while there, and she spent two years doing this, labelling samples and so on.
Pretty ordinary so far then guys.
Introducing - mysterious room that only some people are allowed to go in.
Well, being an 'adventurous' and 'brave' sort, the woman decided to venture into the forbidden room where she discovered a time machine called 'the iron mass'.
Next thing you know, she was working in the time machine room, assisting people with all their time travelling needs - her days of beaker labelling well and truly behind her.
It turns out time travel has been a thing since the 70s, but it's banned, hence no one knows about it... Moving on.
After a year working as an assistant on the time travel machine, the woman decided she wanted a taste of the future action, and her wish was granted when she was sent as part of a squad of 20 to the year 3500.
However, it turned out 'the world had turned into a war zone' and due to 'radioactive and magnetic waves' they couldn't travel back to the present, meaning they spent a year there before being captured by aliens... be careful what you wish for and all that
From here, the time travel dream really turned into a nightmare.
The woman said: "I won't go into details because the pain, humiliation and torture we went through was inhumane."
The woman was the only one of the squad to survive, staying there as a slave, until as if by magic she was returned to the present - but she didn't return on her lonesome.
She said: "I am pregnant from an alien. Five months from now, I will give birth to a child who will be a mix of a human and an alien from the Andromeda Galaxy.
"I don't know what to do, I can't even imagine the solution to this."
While it is easy to disregard all of the above as false, the woman has promised to show us her alien baby when it is born, so I guess we will have to wait and see.
*If the first ever human/alien baby is born in November, I would like to apologise to the woman for being so insensitive about her ordeal.*
Featured Image Credit: PA