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Psychologist reveals three red flag phrases narcissists will say to you

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Published 13:21 20 Feb 2024 GMT

Psychologist reveals three red flag phrases narcissists will say to you

The tell-tale signs of a narcissist have been revealed

Joshua Nair

Joshua Nair

Spotting the signs of a narcissist can be incredibly difficult.

But what about trying to spot these signs in your potentially narcissistic partner?

It makes it even harder to look past the feelings you have for them to recognise their toxic mannerisms, but it's important to spot the signs.

People can often say things they don't mean in spats with their significant others, but psychologists have highlighted three particular phrases that can indicate the negative personality trait.

The personality trait of narcissism can be defined as thinking incredibly highly of yourself, needing admiration, believing you are superior to others and lacking a sense of empathy for other people.

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It has been found that partners of people with narcissistic traits have a higher likelihood of developing mental health problems due to their potentially emotionally abusive relationship.

Indiana-based psychologist Erin Leonard has revealed the 'seemingly innocent' phrases to look out for, that could indicate that it's time to exit the relationship.

Writing for Psychology Today, she said: "Bringing a problem to a narcissistic partner can be painful.

"It seems to ignite an ugly battle that is rarely fruitful."

There are three phrases to look out for in your potentially narcissistic partner.
Getty Stock Photo

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Without further ado, here are the three 'extremely manipulative' phrases to keep an eye out for.

"I'm sorry you feel that way"

It comes across as a dismissive statement, as Leonard explains: "Instead of the partner putting themselves in your shoes to attempt to understand how you feel, they immediately reject your feeling and label it 'yours'."

She highlights it as an 'anti-empathetic statement', saying that they don't care enough to try and 'understand how you feel or where you are coming from'.

Better ways to show that you don't understand are given by the expert, such as: "I'm not sure why you're upset but I want to understand," or any other phrase that acknowledges the partner's feelings.

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A narcissist will never acknowledge their partner's feelings.
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"You have anger issues"

A narcissist can often go on the offensive, even if they are the one in the wrong, which can feel unfair for their partner.

Leonard says: "Being unfairly attacked when you are not the one who made the mistake can be maddening.

"It is natural to get upset in this situation. Yet often the narcissist takes advantage of this and accuses you of being 'out of control'."

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She concludes that they are the ones who are full of rage and out of control.

"You ruined it"

The psychologist states that it is an 'attempt to inflict guilt'.

They may also pull the silent treatment and act like they are 'mortally wounded', over-dramatising a situation.

"Either way, they are communicating to you that you are not allowed to confront them or express a feeling in the relationship that they do not like," she explains.

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Leonard also states that you must bear in mind that it is important to talk through your problems to maintain a healthy relationship.

"If you are punished for attempting to address a problem, it may be your partner who is unable to work out conflict," she highlights.

Featured Image Credit: Lionsgate/HBO

Topics: Mental Health, Sex and Relationships

Joshua Nair
Joshua Nair

Joshua Nair is a journalist at LADbible. Born in Malaysia and raised in Dubai, he has always been interested in writing about a range of subjects, from sports to trending pop culture news. After graduating from Oxford Brookes University with a BA in Media, Journalism and Publishing, he got a job freelance writing for SPORTbible while working in marketing before landing a full-time role at LADbible. Unfortunately, he's unhealthily obsessed with Manchester United, which takes its toll on his mental and physical health. Daily.

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@joshnair10

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