It's every lazy person's dream to make a good living sitting on their arse, and now there might just be the opportunity that we have all been waiting for.
It turns out you can earn money by becoming a poo donor. Yes, you read that correctly. A poo donor.
The company is called OpenBiome, and they are a not-for-profit stool bank. Basically, they'll pay you for your poo if you can get it to them. It's $40 (£28) per shite with a bonus offer of $50 (£35) more for those who can do it five times per week.
Do the maths: that's potentially $250 (£170) per week, or $13,000 (£9,200) - for stuff that you would ordinarily flush away down the toilet and - let's face it - was coming out of you either way.
When you think about it, how much have you already wasted through not selling your poo?
So, why on earth would someone pay good money for a load of old shite? Well, for good reason it turns out.
Healthy crap needs to be collected because of a horrible bacterium called Clostridium Difficile, or C. Diff for short.
C. Diff infects the bowels and can lead to a whole heap of very unpleasant illnesses and diseases - some of which can be life-threatening.
Basically, the crafty C. Diff bacteria can not always be treated with antibiotics, so other options had to be made available.
While it's not pretty, it is effective to perform what is known as a faecal transplant.
You've guessed it - they take a nice, healthy poo and put it into the guts of a patient who is suffering from bad colon bacteria.
The healthy stool then apparently wipes out all of the dangerous microorganisms therein and gives the patient a lovely healthy digestive system - even if it is full of someone else's shite.
Bizarrely, it works really well. Eighty-five percent of patients are completely rid of C. Diff after their first go.
This means that not only are you literally selling someone your old shite, you are also potentially helping to save somebody's life. Doesn't that make you feel warm inside?
However, like all perfect jobs, there is a catch.
Firstly, you've got to live in Massachusetts, USA. Pretty much within Boston, Cambridge, or Somerville.
Secondly, you must have really healthy poo. Like REALLY healthy.
There are a whole heap of questionnaires and health checks as well as passing a few preliminary rounds. Presumably eating battered haggis and drinking exclusively fizzy lager will disqualify you.
You'll also have stool and blood tests to check that you don't carry anything nasty. If that goes well, you're basically in.
These checks continue afterwards though - you can only go for 60 days without checks, making that sweet $13,000 per year unlikely.
The OpenBiome website states: "After 60 days of donating, you will undergo the health assessment and blood and stool screens again. If you pass, the stool you donated will be released to treat patients all over the country! You are welcome to keep donating for another 60 days, and many donors do."
Still, it has to be better than working for a living, right?
Featured Image Credit: PA
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